I have to say I'm not really moved by language like, "95 MPH projectile" that seeks to exaggerate the risk involved. Your argument would be stronger without it.
Yes, but descriptions that reduce complex interactions to their simplest form -- e.g. baseball is "grown men hitting a ball with a stick" -- is an old trick to conceal complexity for dubious motives.
It's true that baseball is, in fact, grown men hitting a ball with a stick, but it isn't merely that. We all understand that that description is designed to ridicule something that is much bigger than its parts.
So, yes, yours is a literal description, but it's also a clumsy and unnatural account that's crafted to manipulate the reader.
Which is fine, as far as it goes; I just think your argument would be stronger without it.
