That is, of course, until the present batch of small companies grow big (or die) and all the big companies are putting words like "suck" and "cool" on their corporate blurbs. Then the next batch of small companies will ape them because people never change, and then early adopters will start looking out for companies with "people who care enough to sound professional" (excerpted from the future version of OP).
I thought I was the only one bored of those "friendly" company that use cool expressions to talk about themselves (ex : "we kick ass at what we're doing, woot!", "no more boring meeting! yay!").
I don't want to be friend with a company or a product, I just want it to look pro in what they are doing. Does your dentist says "I clean the crap out of your teeth! giddyup!"?
Maybe when that "we are friendly" trend will be over, the smaller companies will have access to "big" companies not because they try to sound bigger than they are but because they are pro.
It is possible to sound professional without sounding boring, and I'd also argue that being honest about the scale and capabilities of your company is a big part of professionalism.
"UberSoft is a leading provider in synergistic data-driven technologies focused on improving ROI through market-driven analytics. The UberSoft Team has over twenty years of experience in delivering proven solutions to our corporate partners." is fluff.
"Spend less time marketing, and more time watching hockey. UberSoft makes marketing easy, because we've got a really great way to link statistics from news feeds into your existing analytics." is honest, and a lot more memorable.
Dead on. As tired as I am of all the friendless as well, there are shades of gray in the between. Take even the balsamiq example the article uses -- the website doesn't jump in your face; it simply tries to be more honest and not present itself as a Fortune 501 company.
And when that happens, I'll be ready...