I disagree with the advice to "focus on the positive feedback". You will already have an unrealistically optimistic view of your app, because it's your baby. Your purpose in showing it to HN (or any other audience) is to get a more accurate picture of both their positive aspects and their shortcomings. If you focus only on positive feedback, you get validation, but you don't find out how to improve.
Research has found that novices disproportionately seek positive feedback, whereas experts seek negative feedback[0]. Would you rather be more like a novice, or more like an expert?
Doyen of entrepreneurs, Elon Musk, also advices entrepreneurial wannabes to seek negative feedback[1]:
"Always seek negative feedback, even though it can be mentally painful. They won't always be right, but I find the single biggest error people make is to ignore constructive, negative feedback."
I've noticed that as well in some extent in martial arts. In the beginning, you seek positive feedback -- Hey, I'm doing the thing right! After a while, you've broken past that and are looking for negatives. However, the mindset should be that finding negatives are indeed positive outcomes, and negative feedback is not actually bad at all.
I've heard someone say that there's 3 outcomes to showing somebody your work -- love it, hate it, and apathy. It's of course a spectrum, but you want to drive one of the 2 extremes rather than in the middle. If people are like "meh", then they're not going to give you any feedback.
Number 5 is correct though. If you're asking people for feedback, very few of us want to pay right now. Otherwise we'll ignore it, because spending time on the internet giving you feedback is just something we like to do and not something we have to.
I understand the point you and others are making - it is the standard advice after all, now endorsed by Tony Stark himself!
But, I still believe it's better to ignore negative feedback if it demoralises you so much that you give up on your idea, or makes you feel you're not good enough.
The keyword in your quote is "constructive", which is the bit that is often missing on HN.
After some thought I felt that it'd be nice to not let any 'Show HN posts' pass through without some sort of criticism and/or value assessment. Give it a domain-ban, if the post deserves it... but don't let it get away without the Mordor's eye.
Quite often we see some really nice pieces of work dropping off the new-page with just 1/2 votes. Later the same page pops up to the front with better timing or sort. And also sometimes not so great pieces of work pop up on the front page simply because of timing, clout and other factors - call it kismet, not karma.
I personally try to vote projects off the new page, to support ones which are good, but probably not many HN'ers waylay (I could be totally wrong on this assumption though) the new submissions page.
Here is what I think that could be done:
All show HN: posts be given a round of review/criticism. Let there be some extra weight, extra time and also heavier penalty during the charged life of such a post. A separate tab like Ask HN: perhaps?
Research has found that novices disproportionately seek positive feedback, whereas experts seek negative feedback[0]. Would you rather be more like a novice, or more like an expert?
Doyen of entrepreneurs, Elon Musk, also advices entrepreneurial wannabes to seek negative feedback[1]:
"Always seek negative feedback, even though it can be mentally painful. They won't always be right, but I find the single biggest error people make is to ignore constructive, negative feedback."
[0] http://blogs.cuit.columbia.edu/sf2559/files/2011/08/FF_JCR_F...
[1] http://news.investors.com/management-leaders-in-success/0821...