I genuinely recommend a pet, especially a cat, to any depressed person reading this comment with even just a modicum of income. It’s the perfect amount of responsibility and payoff, to put it in terms a robot could understand. It’s very hard to fuck up so badly to cause permanent injury or death, and most unadopted cats live lives much worse than you at your worst. Take the risk, adopt, fix, and grow.
My neighbour got a dog but they do not look after it. Please only get a pet if you plan to give it love. Leaving it at the house all day while you work and not taking it for walks is completely unfair on the animal, and they (and everyone in our building) suffer because of it.
That said, especially for introverts, a dog can be a magical thing. Proper care requires daily walks and dogs are, by nature, gregarious. Some breeds will attract other people without effort (I had a beagle and had I known how appealing they were to other people, I would have gotten one when I was a lonely single man). Walking a dog daily means you get daily exercise and daily socialization.
I would agree, but with a caveat, especially with a cat: be prepared for a long haul, and possibly not what you expected. I got a cat when I was 23 and single, and after a couple years (and marriage) she got a seizure disorder that required twice-daily medicine. She lived for 17 years. She was an extraordinary companion, but if you had told me that I would turn 40 before she passed, and would move her through five states, I would have never believed you. My wife passed, then one year to the day, that cat passed. So aside from the obvious, I wouldn’t trade the experience with her for anything.
One of the costs, if you are childfree, is that you now go from zero dependents to non-zero dependents. This cuts off a lot of options in life: your remote job can no longer be done from Japan for two months in the summer or an island in Thailand for a quarter in the winter.
There is a huge value to being able to travel for long periods on short notice in the first half of one’s life. A pet mostly/usually prevents that.
> I genuinely recommend a pet, especially a cat, to any depressed person reading this comment
I can second that, my first boss (excluding family cats before I went to Uni and later had my own place) helped me through some bad spots¹ by just existing and being pleased to see me. On days I would otherwise have hibernated, getting up to make sure she had breakfast and a clean tray meant I was up and that made doing something with the day for myself much easier. She was one of my key constants through the ups & downs. And after a bad day at work, being purred at is wonderful, as was just playing around with a thing-on-a-string for her entertainment. I went a bit odd(er) during the covid lockdowns, I would have no doubt dealt even worse with the “stir-crazy” thing without her company.
> with even just a modicum of income.
Though if you only have “a modicum”, I strongly recommend pet insurance.
Gayle was taken two years ago, after ~12.5 years as my boss, by an aggressive case of lymphoma. The diagnosis and treatment for that² cost a goodly chunk of money. I was in a position to handle that financial hit without worry, but someone working minimum wage with few savings would have had little choice but to euthanise considerably sooner to avoid a drawn-out painful end without actually properly knowing what was wrong.
A couple of months after Gayle, I adopted an elderly pair (10 years each) from a local rescue. I wasn't quite ready, but the heartstrings were pulled as they'd been there for months with no interest because of their age and how shy they were, they didn't do well in the rescue & foster environments. Max (the shyest of the two) took quite some time to properly settle in and feel safe, but has since become a most affectionate companion (I am sometimes headbutted & massaged to within an inch of my life!). He unfortunately has developed a minor heart condition and had a little trouble with his waterworks³, again nothing that I can't afford to deal with but that someone living closer to their means might struggle to manage.
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[1] FYI: I am <checks official bit of paper> “prone to bouts of bipolar behavioural activity” and have been suffered from burn out.
[2] Palliative care was the only practical option really, the prognosis was such that anything else would likely have had little effect on the outcome and would have just served reduced her QoL in her final months due to vet stress and side effects.
[3] neither uncommon in older males, cats and humans alike!
I recommend more than a modicum of income to be actually responsible. I’ve had a dozen or so mixed breed cats in my life to date. Cancer, diabetes, kidney failure, liver failure, dementia, and FIP have claimed about half of them, with huge medical bills to match. A cat on the street usually dies violently and suddenly, but when you take one in, that includes caring for it in old age too. Cats (and no living animal) is fire-and-forget pet ownership.
Cancer, diabetes, kidney failure, liver failure, dementia, and FIP would all kill a cat on the street, too. It's not irresponsible to give them a sudden, nonviolent death in these cases. It could be argued that spending a lot of money just to keep them alive is selfish. I can give a cat a better life than it would have on the street using a modicum of income, and responsibly not spend a lot of money just to let them suffer should the reaper come knocking.
It’s certainly a polarizing idea I think, but I could never be convinced to start investing thousands of dollars or a huge amount of time into keeping a very sick animal alive. I appreciate and respect the kind hearts of those who would, but I’d force myself to say goodbye.
My only pet, a cat whom I adopted as unexpectedly as Mii was adopted, very mysteriously ran away (super out of character, she was a happily indoor-only cat) when she was 13 but before her health had become a severe impediment or cost. I missed her terribly and still do, but I admit that it was a great blessing to not have been forced to make such a decision. My hope is that she sensed she was dying and some wild part of her deeply wished to be in nature again and in solitude for that experience.
This tantamount of "using" a pet to improve your life than genuinely care for them. What could happen is once you improve your life, you may slowly start detaching from it and throw out. That special bond may not form, if you only buy/adopt because you are depressed.
In that case, you're not using an animal to improve your life. At most, you're forcing yourself to look a bit outwards and focus your energy on an animal, in other ways put strain on yourself.
Most pets love you unconditionally back, as long as you don't abuse & neglect them knowingly. They will look after you and motivate you to continue having this feeling by looking after yourself, too.
Losing a loved pet can leave a scar which can last a life time. I still miss my pet bird, which lived for more than a decade, and died peacefully, and brought limitless joy to everyone in the family, by loving, demanding attention and trolling us.
Animals may look simpler than us, but almost all of them know the language of love and care way better than us.
