What does it look like for someone to confront a situation like this without courage?
To be clear, I'm not really talking about this story in particular, but the way people discuss other people in really bad situations. It seems like almost any reaction that isn't "lie there motionless" gets called "courageous".
I guess it feels more like a pep talk than an evaluation.
I'm not 100% sure, but I've heard from oncologists and other docs that people with bad diagnoses often lash out at doctors and family who are trying to help them.
Some people also go into denial about what's happening, and denial can be fatal. This is not quite 100% on point, but my wife wrote a story about meeting a patient whose large mass on the side of her neck had not been there for just a couple days: https://bessstillman.substack.com/p/just-because-you-wont-se...: "Per triage, my patient’s symptoms started yesterday and she’s worried that the swelling might be an infection or maybe a pulled muscle, but the moment I walk into the room I know that I’m going to ruin her life."
Some attempt to take the hedonic path that would not, I think, be very satisfying, and yet they pursue it (heedlessly spending down cash on trinkets, the non-prescribed drugs you might imagine, Vegas, etc.). This is distinct from someone who decides: "I've always wanted to visit Tokyo and now I'm finally going to do it."
I think it's good to try and lead and positive, generative life, even when what is left of that life is limited, and when what "positive, generative" means will vary widely by person.
> What does it look like for someone to confront a situation like this without courage?
There’s a lot of dark places people can go and choose to stay when they experience tragedy. Drugs, alcohol abuse, suicide, wallowing in misery etc. Perhaps you’ve never experienced tragedy, or been tempted by these dark reactions but for many they are all too familiar and it takes enormous courage to combat them. Seeing examples of others who are suffering reacting positively is greatly encouraging.
I was diagnosed with cancer in 2013. I had many surgeries, lots of radiation therapy, and like the woman in "Brazil", my complications developed complications. I feel I received excellent care, and I have had no tumors spotted in 8-ish years. But I've been in pain every waking hour of every day since May 16th 2013. Sometimes the pain isn't too bad, sometimes I lie in bed, legs rigid with pain, and scream. If I get a serious recurrence of my cancer, or a new cancer, I'm going to blow my brains out. I can't conceive of anything occurring in my future that would make it worth going through a multi-year episode of surgeries and other aggressive cancer treatments again.
To be clear, I'm not really talking about this story in particular, but the way people discuss other people in really bad situations. It seems like almost any reaction that isn't "lie there motionless" gets called "courageous".
I guess it feels more like a pep talk than an evaluation.