I prefer my husband's company when he's a bit tired because when he's well rested he can be "too much" -- his energy level, his anxiousness, his sense of humor, are all amplified, sometimes to an annoying degree.
I've noticed this with other guys that just need to chill out a bit when socializing -- especially tech folks.
It's more about energy level than smartness.
No need to be hungover -- maybe just relax a bit, take things slower, talk less, go on fewer (or no) tangents, etc., and you might achieve the same result.
I agree with what you are saying about energy levels but take issue with these suggestions. How does an inherently anxious and energetic person "just relax" and "take things slowly"? I mean, the phrase "just relax" generates (for a younger version of me) a thought bubble that would read: I thought I was relaxed!!
> talk less, go on fewer (or no) tangents
What's worse, someone babbling about something they're excited about? Or sitting in awkward silence because they're mentally keeping score of who's saying more words in the conversation?
Again, I am 100% with you on the excess energy levels making someone annoying. I am just looking for actionable, less generic suggestions. To bring it back to the start of your post:
> I prefer my husband's company when he's tired
How does your husband get tired enough to be tolerable?
It might be energy level, I have wondered whether I am overly caffeinated and thats where its coming from. But youre right, theres a "jumpiness". I do think my general lifestyle (many hours of programming) primes my brain for a certain way of working. If I stop coding, and for instance hike all the time, my suspicion is this would go away to some degree.
I've noticed this with other guys that just need to chill out a bit when socializing -- especially tech folks.
It's more about energy level than smartness.
No need to be hungover -- maybe just relax a bit, take things slower, talk less, go on fewer (or no) tangents, etc., and you might achieve the same result.