Volunteering. And before you brush it out skeptically, like "oh yeah right, those people", it really doesn't have to be anything you don't care about.
I volunteer at a boat house on the city lake nearby, just putting kids on pedal boats and kayaks. I don't even call it volunteering, I just love kayaks and water.
It's amazing how your perspective of time and people and service shifts, when you spend some time being "in service" to other people, instead of anxiously counting hours that you're being paid for — or could've been paid for — and maximizing "receiving".
I've confirmed for myself time and time again the advice I've read: if you have a busy life and want to increase a feeling that you have more time? — try spending your time for free, for example, volunteering.
I wish this wasn't brushed off, but when I suggest it, frequently, as a scientifically proven method of improving happiness, well, it gets brushed off. I guess it's really difficult to relate just how much it can improve your life. Some of the highlights of my entire life have been coaching 3rd/4th grade girls basketball at a YMCA. Yeah, it's a lot of work at the time, but the memories are priceless, and the benefit to the kids is definite - they tell me, years (and sometimes years and years - with a baby in their arms) later.
Definitely! I like gardening. I started volunteering in a community garden, growing stuff for people who need more food. I like the people I work with, and I enjoy growing vegetables on a bigger scale than I can do in my own garden. And they make tea and cake, and often we get to take home some spare seedlings or whatever.
It's really great, it doesn't feel anything like "free labour", it mostly feels like hanging out with some nice people and doing a fun activity.
"Community garden" isn't quite the right term. It's actually primarily a food rescue organisation (takes unsold produce etc from supermarkets and redistributes it to poor people) that also grows a bit of their own produce as well, which is the bit I help with.
I happened to be at a kind of mini festival where there was a stand actively recruiting for volunteers. They seemed pretty surprised and happy when I immediately said yes.
The actual "community gardens" that I know of generally are on the model of members each have their own plot, which they tend. I don't know how one volunteers in a space like that, but maybe there are opportunities.
+1 to this; some of the best people I've met in my city are from the local DIY bike co-op. I started out walking in to check it out and see if they had any good bikes, and now I open the shop and teach bike repair there once a week with several friends I wouldn't have otherwise met.
I can definitely agree. I used to be very skeptical about how fun or healing volunteering could be. I started volunteering at an animal shelter and beyond being incredibly relaxing - I love animals - it's nice to switch from trying to optimize my career, code, education to just using my hands to help take care of something and meet new people.
My anxiety has gone down a lot since I started doing this and I was able to meet some new people. Strongly recommend trying to volunteer with something you care about
Definitely this. Volunteering is an awesome way to develop community. I struggled to make friends in a new community where I was working remotely for years (pre-COVID). I finally really started connected with people my second season being involved with a youth sports program. 6 years later, we just had 50 people over to our house. 30 of them were connected to that sports program in some way.
My dad met his best friend volunteering with the local soccer league in my hometown. The story I heard years later was that my mom insisted to him that he do something to get out of the house, and two decades later they were still the best of friends—and, in fact, had moved to the same overseas city around the same time.
I intend to try some form of this once I have more leisure time. I'm a parent and I don't see it happening in the foreseeable future unless it involves my kids.
Fortunately, coaching sports for children begins about age 6 in the US and continues through 16+... so there is plenty available.
Scouting (girls or boys, in spite of BSA's recent settlement) continues to add a lot of value to kids' lives, and ime attract many people with a strong moral compass.
Robotics - the FIRST program. Mechanical, EE, or SWE experiences can let you work with teenagers in a very impactful way. This would not require as much of a time commitment as a sport or scouting group.
See if you can look for (or create) opportunities for your kids to practice doing service, and support them. It's an important part of life, like exercise or intellectual growth.
It's almost impossibly easy to find volunteer activities if you have kids, everything from daycare to school to field trips to soccer, they're almost always quite open to volunteer help.
Yeah, personaly I started volunteering when I realised I had a surfeit of free time. I ended with a nearby charity, tutoring high school kids from less privileged background; not necessarily the most fun activity, but at least I got to keep my basic mathematics fresh.
But seeing how much time kids take, I understand not being able to do that now; most of the people in the charity where I volunteer are retired.
One of my obstacles: it's a stones throw away from a retail/service job.
Okay not really. But what I mean is, the way people respect you. My obstacle is my fear of being treated the way I was 15 years ago when I had to work retail before my professional career. In that sense I'm HAPPY that I work behind a computer screen. But I do think it's made me very isolated, introverted, and lonely.
One important difference is that in retail, you had to deal with it, or risk losing your job / getting written up. In volunteering, if someone is being a jerk to you then you can call them out on it. And I think it is less likely you’ll run into a jerk when you’re volunteering. It’s not like working at Walmart.
Wife and I volunteer for our kids school, and also the kids weekend sports (Soccer, Cricket).
We've made a lot of friends through that and because it's all local a strong sense of community between all the families that get involved.
By accident: I went to this boat house a few times just to rent a kayak, and when I was chatting with the person who runs it she asked if I'd want to come volunteer on a weekend — and I did.
People there are the most eclectic mix of backgrounds: the owner is a retired coastal guard, she was in Olympic games in her 20s as a windsurfer. Her partner is a retired engineer, who is helping fixing boats when something breaks. Some local kids and teenagers would come volunteer. Our customers are local families and tourists, enjoying their weekend in the park on the lake. And of course a micro-community of retirees chatting with the boat house owner, sharing gossip and their life stories, bringing ice cream for kids and getting their afternoon sun.
It's been more than a year since I started volunteering there, and it transformed my experience beyond any expectations, filling my days with sun, people, stories, little adventures and camaraderie.
I think volunteering gets brushed off because in many places it is just a pure scam. The organizations collect money and then charge volunteers exorbitant sums for the privilege of working for free.
I looked at volunteering about 15 years ago and from what I saw then, I have never entertained the thought again.
Seems a pretty overly strong statement, no? Is there any research in to percentage of non profit efforts that are/aren't legitimate? Can you elaborate on "what I saw then" that made you think it was indicative of the entire idea of volunteer work?
I have had the opposite experience. All the best people in the world I've met have been volunteering for one thing or another. As a young tech guy I've provided general tech support to as many institutions around me as need it and I've never once felt anyone was anything but earnest. Feels unfair to write so much off. I hope you find an organization you would feel comfortable volunteering for again. It really does provide immense benefit to the mind/heart
> Can you elaborate on "what I saw then" that made you think it was indicative of the entire idea of volunteer work?
Yes, I was looking to do international volunteer work and used the internet to search for opportunities, since I knew nobody with experience. Fully willing to pay for my own travels of course. All I could find was programs where you had to pay thousands of dollars, your own food and your own board in order to volunteer. For a few weeks.
That is sadly as far as I got before dismissing the concept as a scam.
I decided to do another similar search right now, more than a decade later. Still seems like the same thing and this is what I get from opening all the search results from the first page:
"Volunteer Shark Conservation in Fiji for Teenagers
Price: $4,470 USD for 2 weeks"
"Volunteer with Children in Fiji
Price: $2,470 USD for 1 week"
"Volunteer Community Work in Fiji for Teenagers
Price: $3,045 USD for 2 weeks"
"Childcare & Community Volunteer Work in Peru for Teenagers
Price: $3,645 USD for 2 weeks"
"Affordable fees from $525 for 1 week"
"Volunteer in Africa with Agape
completely affordable for our volunteers.
Programmes from £675"
"Teach English abroad - Costa Rica
USD 339 - That’s just USD 48 per day*..."
"Volunteer to assist in improving physical and mental health for women, girls and communities in Ghana, West Africa.
Special offer!
Get up to 25% off
1 week £ 1,645"
"Help children and families overcome severe poverty
Inspire and guide youth to productive futures as a volunteer in Peru.
1 week $2956"
Honestly, I don't care for these grifters and scammers. Good luck to them.
There are probably hundreds of thousands of eager and able-bodied youths every year who would have loved to volunteer and help their fellow man (or animal), but could only find these scams and decided against doing such a thing. Better just get drunk in the hostel, at least that won't set them back thousands of dollars. Consider the loss.
I took a look at the United Nations. They offer two spots for youth volunteering: have to be 18-26 years old and with a bachelors degree and relevant experience. The volunteering spots are both in Mogadishu in Somalia. The description doesn't have any details about cost, so I guess these are actually free.
Perhaps you and the other posters are talking past each other. For me the word “volunteering” conjures thoughts of spending some weekends doing things for local charities within easy driving distance of my home, not paying to travel overseas. I suspect most Americans at least would see it my way, which is why the other posters are incredulous at your seeming dismissal of “most” volunteer organizations.
Very interesting. Sorry you had such an unfortunate experience. I'm realizing now how lucky I was to have been introduced to all the groups I have been by real members of the local groups. With the type of opportunity you were looking for makes a lot of sense why you found what you did. I have not touched any large scale international groups (couple branches of larger orgs were just ok) really and maybe that's the difference. Either way, I'm sorry you weren't able to find volunteer work. It has helped me immensely and I hope one day you can benefit from it should circumstance allow.
>You're assuming every place and organization on the planet is like the one you volunteer at
Not really, but I did, perhaps naively, think at least a better percentage as earnest than the other commenter was giving credit for. You're right though, after reading his detailed response I do realize now I've been very lucky in how I came to do what I do with who I do it with.
^ This sometimes occurs with international volunteering programs ("voluntourism").
Lots of pitfalls and sad stories in that space. Most of the other comments here are discussing helping out with small local orgs which might not be what carlosjobim had in mind.
I got in with a new "startup" community bicycle hub. They were just getting off the ground so it was pretty chaotic at first. Now it's humming along and, from a selfish perspective, my mental health is much better spending a couple hours a week volunteering with them.
I work at a sports program that charges volunteers, but that’s because it’s set up as a coop. Everyone has to donate time and money to use the facilities. The fee is really small compared to what you get to, 1/5 of comparable facilities.
It’s an amazing program, too. No one involved would ever call it a scam IMO.
This is a bizarre account, and completely dissimilar to anything I've ever heard of or experienced. Any specific organizations you can recall that engaged in this practice?
I'm sorry, but this is an absurd statement that might apply in some extremely narrow niche of "volunteering". But volunteering is a very broad activity that happens in all kinds of organisations, and even without any organisation at all.
It's sort of like you got food poisoning from eating Mexican food once, and from then on, decided to only ever eat burgers for the rest of your life.
I volunteer at a boat house on the city lake nearby, just putting kids on pedal boats and kayaks. I don't even call it volunteering, I just love kayaks and water.
It's amazing how your perspective of time and people and service shifts, when you spend some time being "in service" to other people, instead of anxiously counting hours that you're being paid for — or could've been paid for — and maximizing "receiving".
I've confirmed for myself time and time again the advice I've read: if you have a busy life and want to increase a feeling that you have more time? — try spending your time for free, for example, volunteering.