There are some good points here (stop listening to uptight young women), but you ruin it completely by essentially ending it with a less condescending version of "have sex incel", effectively making the entire comment a very lengthy filler until that point.
But yes women aren't monotone, but that's not what these men are complaining about, it's the same complaint you may face as a female but instead it might be your butt, breasts or weight.
In other words that the dating game IS unfair because it's hyper fixated on one element of a person effectively objectifying them.
That said, dating online is always a handicap no matter how much of a precived 10/10 you are, since it'll never be able to make a stranger able to validate you as a whole and vice versa, in contrast to a reoccurring social meeting it gives you ample time to allow both you and the stranger to validate you.
The issue there of course is that at least in the west that you have a lot of old myths and norms taught to children that warps our perception on how we form social connections (i.e. We go on autopilot in school expecting friends to be handed to us).
The comments above are focusing on dating (and in particular, on dating sites), but that's not really what the article is about. The people in the article have complaints beyond dating:
> colleagues constantly made remarks about his stature. “I was not treated with respect,” Scott told me. “At every single workplace I’ve been in, there've been several situations where people commented on my height to discredit me entirely as a person.”
> For Scott, demeaning comments about height are everywhere — whether in his personal life or in pop culture. He singled out TikTok particularly, where jokes about men’s height are rampant.
> I asked Westrich to describe the most common experiences that patients shared with her. “One [complaint] I hear quite often is ‘I don’t get the same respect as others. I’ve accomplished so much and I’m still often treated like a child.’”
> ... “I would still go on the internet and see ‘Men below this height shouldn’t have rights.’”
People should of course be free to date who they want, but not to harass, mock, demean, or disrespect people for being short.
I wondered how someone so hostile could survive moderation here, so I looked at your comment history. It seems like your hostility started just 10 days ago, when you started posting things like:
> What the fuck kind of misanthropic sociopath are you?
> How disconnected from reality do you have to be for me to have to make this comparison explicit???
> Because you probably can't do anything other than voice your useless opinion.
> I wondered how someone so hostile could survive moderation here
Not related to GP, but check out any front page political thread to see how hostility and toxicity evade moderation. There are tricks you can use to effectively ad-hominem someone without making it explicit and instantly flagged to the ground.
> The main purpose of the hypophora is to enable the speaker to anticipate the listeners' concerns and then address them within the context of his own speech.
You utilize it to discredit any further argument by asking a question regarding someone’s reasons or motive and instantly shoot them down with something negative that makes their argument look shoddy.
Also in general deep threads tend to hide hostility for a bit, especially if all sides are engaged. I’ve seen very deep threads that became nothing but different groups souring each other on here once. I imagine it gets harder to moderate when everyone is fighting and use user moderation is weakened.
I mean... in my case, there wasn't really much of an argument. I guess it was "rich people are better than poor people," which, I do want to discredit, but also don't want to legitimize.
Let's discuss this thread. You aren't discussing in good faith when you reduce the complaints in the article (paraphrasing): "I want to be respected at work and not be mocked on social media" to (exact quote): "Men complaining about women should be ridiculed and will always earn my condescension".
> It gives me quite a lot of catharsis to call an idiot, an idiot.
I don't think Hacker News is meant to be a place where people find catharsis by calling other people idiots. Then again it's not my site; perhaps dang will indeed allow it.
If everyone responded to content they found unwelcome with hostility and insults, the site would be nothing but a shouting match. That's why there are tools that remove unwelcome content without adding more, like downvoting and flagging.
Is it also sexist when women complain about being judged/mocked/disrespected for their weight?
The details are different for men and women but both can experience similar problems. Really the dividing line here isn't between men and women; it's between privileged and disadvantaged.
I guess it's called "body shaming" now, and it's one of the only remaining socially acceptable prejudices. There may not be a solution, but harassing people for talking about how painful it can be isn't helpful.
It is sexism when those women specify that they are being mocked by men. Being mean is not a trait inherent to women or men as the prevailing attitude in these comments implies.
>for talking about how painful it can be isn't helpful.
Allowing a culture of men complaining about women to fester is not healthy for society.
But yes women aren't monotone, but that's not what these men are complaining about, it's the same complaint you may face as a female but instead it might be your butt, breasts or weight.
In other words that the dating game IS unfair because it's hyper fixated on one element of a person effectively objectifying them.
That said, dating online is always a handicap no matter how much of a precived 10/10 you are, since it'll never be able to make a stranger able to validate you as a whole and vice versa, in contrast to a reoccurring social meeting it gives you ample time to allow both you and the stranger to validate you.
The issue there of course is that at least in the west that you have a lot of old myths and norms taught to children that warps our perception on how we form social connections (i.e. We go on autopilot in school expecting friends to be handed to us).