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I've always read that something similar to this effect is the reason behind the https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dodo_bird_verdict and the effectiveness of talk therapy.

People just need to talk to someone who doesn't have ulterior motives, and without the need to maintain a relationship beyond the context of the conversation. Just being able to be honest without censorship, and to be exposed to direct criticism from someone who isn't afraid to hurt your feelings; just those things are healing and constructive.

As a counterpoint, I have found myself intentionally equivocating while talking about obscure programming topics because of my relationship with the person who I was having the conversation with and the fact that I knew that a lot of their identity was wrapped up in a particular position on that topic. You don't want to hurt someone who you want to talk to again.

Honest, deep exchanges with strangers can also be a crucible that finds people that you really do have a deep commonality with. If you're both completely unfiltered and still want to hang out with each other, that's a sign.




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