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Yes, but what does your startup do? (shkspr.mobi)
374 points by edent on Nov 3, 2017 | hide | past | favorite | 195 comments



This applies to websites of open source projects, too. I remember when I visited docker.com for the first time because someone told me it's the latest shit and I just wanted to know what it is about. I browsed their website for 10 minutes, and summarized the experience to a coworker like this: "As far as I can see, it's the best thing ever and I'd be stupid not to use it, but I still does not know what it actually does."

Since then, whenever I make a website (or a README.md) for my open-source projects, I always make sure that it starts with

1. a short description of what the project is/does in one or two sentences, and

2. a longer explanation of the how and why in one or two paragraphs.

Representative example: https://github.com/sapcc/limes/tree/master/README.md


Favorite conference quote ever: "So other than unicorns barfing rainbows, what is Docker?"


Thank you. I'm a hardware guy and I've heard about a dozen of explanations of what Docker is and even tried to set it up on my NAS but I still have no idea. And to the person about to comment with your version, I don't really care to know.


Docker is building, running, and sharing VMs from the command line.


Containers are not VMs (virtual machines): https://blog.docker.com/2016/03/containers-are-not-vms/


Pedantry like this is what scared OP away to begin with. Sometimes you have to resist the urge to correct or convey technical details for someone who will not understand the technical details anyway.

For example, when explaining bitcoin to people I use the analogy of a stack of receipts. That's not technically how a blockchain works, but my mom doesn't care how a blockchain works.


I tend to agree in general but I'm not sure in this case. The fact that containers are/were a form of operating system virtualization--which is how they were once referred to--is probably one of the least interesting aspects of how they're used today.

If I were explaining them to someone less technical I'd say something like they're a way to package programs with the other stuff programs need to run so that they can be reliably and quickly started up and moved from place to place.


But they serve the same purpose, even if their implementations are entirely different.

So it makes sense to provide an initial explanation of one in terms of the other, in special for people who already have some mental model of what virtual machines do.


No, they don't serve the same purpose. Try running a Microsoft Exchange in a Docker container on a Linux server. Then try running it in a Windows VM on a Linux server.


Even if they don't always serve the same purpose, they serve a similar purpose in a number of examples. It's still a valid analogy to get someone thinking about how they might work.


Containers are not VMs in the same way that WINE is Not An Emulator.

That is... yes, that's technically true but to the end user there is very very little difference, if any, unless you start playing with advanced stuff that affects the guts.


Thank you for illustrating my point.


I don't understand why people don't frame the explanation in the context of what problem the thing is trying to solve.

Imagine you have to install a database (let's say postgres) on your machine. You could just install it the regular way - when you do this postgres uses certain things by default like the port 5432.

Now you're going to install a different piece of software on the machine, but this software also uses port 5432 by default and there's an error about the port already being in use. This is a pain, now you have to change the default port. It turns out these conflicts are happening for a lot of things on the machine and it's a hassle to have to make non-standard changes all over the place that you have to keep track of.

For your first attempt to solve this you decide to run postgres in a virtual machine and connect to that, but now you have an entire extra operating system to deal with and all of the overhead that comes with that. Plus you have to configure access to the VM and get all of those pieces to work too.

It'd be nice if there was a way to just install postgres in a place that is easily accessible, but separate from the rest of your machine with regard to things like ports and such. A "container" that it could be installed in that automatically handles things like port conflicts in some magical backend you don't have to deal with so it looks to you like you can always just use the defaults. This container model is basically docker (or at least my current understanding of it).


I hope this PostgreSQL example is simply meant to illustrate a point, and not taken from personal experience. I say that because PostgreSQL is designed to run multiple instances on different ports, and you can run multiple versions along side each other as well. All it takes is editing a couple configuration files.


For me this falls down because my next questions is "cool, so I can run a database in a docker. So my data is save inside the docker?"

Which it isn't, and I still don't know how to attach permanent storage to a docker (if thats even the right term).


What you want is called a "volume". When running a docker container you just pass in the -v option and it maps a directory outside the container to a path that can be used from inside the docker container, e.g. `docker run -v /host/directory:/container/directory ...` would make the directory /host/directory on the host machine accessible inside the container at the path /container/directory.

https://docs.docker.com/engine/admin/volumes/volumes/


While you can directly map the host filesystem to the container filesystem in the manner you describe, that's referred to as a bind mount, not a volume. Volumes reside in the host filesystem as well but are solely managed by Docker.

Outside of trickery requiring the use of bind mounts (I use one to share ~/.ssh between a host user and container user, for example), volumes are recommended.


Huh? What's a port? How do I "install a database"? I already have Excel on my laptop anyway. You lost me at around the third sentence.


You may not be the target audience. Docker is a tool primarily used to help efficiently deploy your networked applications on new servers. If you don't need to deploy server apps, you can stop reading here. If you do need to deploy apps to servers, docker is worth investigating. It replaces a complex install script and git clones with an efficient clone of a lightweight 'vm' which is ready to run your app immediately.


I'm laughing my head off at how your comment, precisely about this point, has spawned a conversation that has included, "it's like a VM", "it's not like a VM", "it depends on how you define VM", "there are lots of definitions for VM", "you can use a volume, just use the --volume flag", "that's not for volumes, that for bind mounts".

OH MY GOSH CAN YOU PEOPLE NOT SEE HOW BADLY DEFINED ALL OF THE NOMENCLATURE IS?


Yeah they are. There are many types of VM.


You’re describing Vagrant


Even more informative could be mentioning what problem it is intended to solve.


Thank you. No one ever describes why anything was written in the first place. And they almost never go out of their way to list the pros/cons of their system. Although I've never even used it, I loved that the BoltDB project mentions other key/value DBs and why you'd pick one over the other, right there in the readme.


Any mention of alternatives is anathema to open source READMEs. This is why the "awesome list of " directories wind up being so useful.

Edit: Useful as in "knowing is half the battle". Being able to make an informed choice is worth something, even if it takes extra effort to filter back down.


Maybe I'm just unlucky but the vast majority of all 'awesome lists' that I've seen are just massive dumps of links, of extremely varying quality (I mean the links themselves), which isn't that helpful.


You're not unlucky, but there are some gems out there. For someone like you who is experienced in the area and can tell garbage from good stuff, it's worth digging around to find the gems.

This doesn't help someone who is completely new to the list topic though. Even worse they're probably going to get bad information.


Maybe an Awesome list of Awesome lists could help


I'm pretty sure there is one already.


That's also a thing that I try to do for my own projects. For example, the frontpage of http://holocm.org has two lists that are literally titled "This is not for you if..." and "This might be for you if..."


A million times yes!

So many times something is created to solve a particular problem, and for those who have experienced that problem the need for the solution is obvious. But for those of us who come along later it's not so obvious why I would want to use X.

I've thought many times that the number one thing that should be explained in any documentation, article about a technology, etc. is what problems this solves and give examples of the problems and how this is a solution to those problems.


A discussion on "how a contributor can get the attention of a maintainer" touched on this briefly two weeks ago:

· How to get an open source community to be interested in helping you | https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=15538112 (2017Oct:140points,45comments)

And a checklist for the reverse, as you discuss:

· https://twitter.com/sehurlburt/status/921921604140937216


Hell, most of the OS projects that get posted here have that very same problem.

When I go to a project's site, I should be able to tell what they do and what they're for within 5-10 seconds, preferably without any scrolling (depending on screen size) and definitely without having to click on anything.


Yes, and in light of this, I still think it's pretty strange that in a project page in GitHub I have to scroll down first before I can read a description.

(People usually don't link to the README file)


so...what _is_ leonardo...


If you refer to SAP Leonardo, I have no fucking clue.


Reminds me of http://n.io – their homepage is almost an homage to HBO's Silicon Valley.

Notable catch phrases: human ingenuity, interoperable connectivity, universal intelligence, distributed intelligence, Chip-to-cloud, unconditional interoperability, ...

"nio provides the technology to unleash your imagination"


Unleashing my imagination is a terrifying idea. I have multiple safeguards in place to keep even the relatively harmless bad and dangerous ideas that live in my imagination from being able to escape.


"I take medication specifically to prevent the scenario you have described to me."


> Unleashing my imagination is a terrifying idea.

Yes, I remember at least one case [1] where that caused some issues :-).

[1] http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0049223/


Also:

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0420223

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt4680182

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1727770

The reified imagination genre is rife with unintended consequences.



I thought the book was pretty good- might just be me.


Reminds me of the gamer episode of Black Mirror.


Double irony on the careers page: "Speaking of our team members, instead of touting buzzwords and industry jargon about ping-pong tables or "rockstars" we went straight to the source." Then they call the team members "innovators". I don't think it's a joke though; if it is they put a lot of work into it.

Edit: The individual product pages are a lot more informative. Looks like they specialize in visual code editors and a platform for distributed apps.


And the "Team" page couldn't be more cliche-laden either.. lots of dogs and of course, "You should also know that we like dogs, office mini-golf, and breakfast burritos."

WTH it's hilarious that the once-harmless-banal-mild-infantilism of odd underdog side projects and garage up-starts has now infested every executive's/investor's mind such that they feel apparent competetive pressure to ensure a quip like the above will be "obligatorily" present. The only reason this sort of stuff was at first inspiring, "human touch", or exhilarating was because it contrasted so starkly with mainstream biz heuristics. No longer, so might as well all drop the pretend bouncy-castle-playground-mentality right now.


I'm one of those that abhors the Playskoolization of professional services (I don't fit in to that culture myself), don't buy into marketing and am not easily moved, but having sat through a ton of sales meetings from vendors that take both the infantile as well as the more traditional "adult" approaches-- the latter always comes across as cold and sterile, like we're just one more sale they need to make quota.

Product viability being equivalent, the decision comes down to "do I want to do business with some hipsters and their dogs, or do I want to do business with the Borg and their lawyers?"

The human approach still works.


I get that (although probably locale-dependent: biz people in my corner of the world rarely perceive each others as "borgs" and frankly also have little reason to =) but my musing here was more towards the inevitable pendulum swing that turns the whole "hipsters-with-dogs" aesthetic is turning into tomorrow's "lame sterile" (ie 2nd-hand, motion-performing) "borgs". =)


I like how this is stuff I "should know." Like something dire might happen if I don't know up front that I'm entering into a collaboration with people who prefer certain pets and food!

Although hold on, it dawns on me that they might be trying to say these are things in the actual workplace, i.e. it's loud and distracting and smells like burrito farts and (most likely unwashed) dogs. If that's the case, I actually do appreciate knowing up front. But even here they're being super vague. "I like dogs" is different from "I bring my dog to work." Is it the one or the other? Even if I wanted to bring my own dog to work, I still have no idea if that's okay. Don't make people guess!


"We specialize in visual code editors and a platform for distributed apps."

Missing from the home page.


I‘d actually like to be called innovator rather than Rockstar, as well as prefer working with innovators than people behaving like Rockstars...

EDIT:

(Besides that, i agree, realizing this was still the n.io thread after posting this, there’s definitely no reason to take this shop seriously...)


Almost, but not quite - based on their fuzzy descriptions, I had a feeling it's a similar area I do research and development in. Turns out I was right, but I had to find actual product documentation to confirm it: "nio is a highly-scalable stream processing engine that allows you to asynchronously process streaming data signals and act on them in real time. nio is the brain of your real-time application, particularly systems that require distributed processing." https://docs.n.io/getting_started/


Come on, that web site has to be a parody, even down to the dogs on the "Team" page.

If it's actually a real company, my best guess is they are a custom engineering software consultancy. Although on the other hand, they seem to have some sort of product you can download, but I can't tell what it does. It's all so confusing. Perfect example, whalesalad.


> even down to the dogs on the "Team" page.

They do get points for, "Gus - The Lead Software Barkitect"


It's not a parody it's a genre. There are many others out there.

Representative example: https://unroll.me/team/


Isn't https://unroll.me the service that was helping people unsubscribe from email lists, while selling their data to uber?

https://theintercept.com/2017/04/24/stop-using-unroll-me-rig...


Strangely I don't see any references on their site to Rakuten, the Japanese corporation that owns them. They also use all of the data they scrape from your emails across their huge catalog of companies.


Indeed, that's how I discovered that gem in the first place.


I think... its real, go to their blog page and they describe how to put nio into a rpi.

https://niolabs.com/blog/baking-nio-into-a-raspberry-pi/


I've spent far more time than I should have digging through their site... basically it looks like they've built a sort of labview/mindstorms type app? They have a library of "blocks" and they're trying to sell the "you don't need to be a programmer to build programs" feature. It actually looks quite fun - I don't get why they had to present it so absurdly


Perhaps it started as a joke and mistakenly became a business, like the fellow who got elected in Australia?


Also known from dhmo who's been mistaken for a legitimate source of information.


Their twitter has over 3000 tweets, and not all of them look like they were auto-generated or retweets.

If it's not real then I don't know why someone would go through all that trouble, unless it's real in the sense of existing solely for conning someone or acting as a front for a 3-letter agency or something.

EDIT: Yeah, it's definitely real. Their team page's link to CEO Twitter account has 14 400 tweets and 1st tweet features a video of a guy listed as one of their engineers.



It's level 2 of Internet Startup Sock-Puppetry. You enable innovation, hyper-connectivity, distribution, and maybe you even empower interoperation of the iOT phase-space for individuals, companies and dogs. Throw in a coffee machine and a third-hand ping-pong table and some beanbag chairs. Don't forget the fancy conference room with lots of big-screen displays showing fancy graphs.

Oh dear, I forgot to include the cloud. And machine learning (in the cloud).

"This conference room table raised our valuation by $800K."

I'm happy I no longer live in Silly Valley.


Until today I was painfully unaware of how leashed my imagination has been.


Clearly you don't have enough "interoperability"


Their "Team" page takes a whooping 37s to fully load for me, and transfers 10 MB over 69 HTTP requests. This suggest an average download speed of ~275 KB/s, but I have a 40 Mbit/s download link. Just... wow.


"If you’re driven by curiosity, free coffee and an unwavering belief in technology as the lever of societal innovation, then check our careers page to see if niolabs is the place for you."

This is just too good.


Huh?

"Behind several years of research and development by the niolabs team, the nio platform was created to seamlessly enable innovation across the world’s biggest issues. As “things” become smarter, the opportunity for technology to provide transformational value becomes both real and increasingly complex. With no agenda or bias other than to provide a tool to deliver hyperconnectivity and intelligence on the user’s terms, nio simplifies the process of digital transformation."

http://nio.applytojob.com/apply/AGIOE2/Data-Architect


"no agenda"

That seems to sum it up.


What in the actual fuck?


That is really absurd. What a great example. "We are currently accepting applications for our early access program" early access to what?


Early access to the Imagination Unleasher 3000 apparently...


You won’t believe what we have coming next. No really, it’s unbelievable. Even I don’t believe it.


An iOT device that dispenses Unicorn Chow.

"That's Unicorn food? Looks like Froot Loops to me."


Well, duh. It's a prototype. We had to build the MVP first. As soon as we fill our Unicorn Hunter position, we'll be all set...


It's only missing a blockchain play.


Zombo.com V2.0. (www.youtube.com/watch?v=qxWwEPeUuAg for the famous zombo.com intro, without Flash)


> we love our Hawaiian shirt Fridays

Please no.


> nio is built to enhance human ingenuity, not limit it. Our products empower developers, system architects, designers, and hackers to build anything from rapid prototypes to smart cities and anything in-between.nio provides the technology to unleash your imagination.

I wonder why they themselves have not made all those smart cities from their wonderful technology. It sounds like an omnipotent force!


I would love to know what "heterogeneous humans" are. Dictionary definition: "originating outside the organism" - which sort of makes sense for, say, collection classes like arrays....I think I need a T-shirt: "I'm with Heterogeneous"


Hmm, they are local. I think I'll apply. :-D


Please let us know if something interesting happens as a result.


It looks like a Zapier FaaS Enterprise IoT thing.


When is there ICO ?


is this real? seems like a very elaborate joke


If it's a joke, its really elaborate, as here's their linkedin page: https://www.linkedin.com/company/9217038/. They list a Colorado address, not Silicon Valley too...


Please take this advice to heart all you startups. I can't tell you how many times I have signed up for a new startup waitlist and then 6 months later I get an email from some ambigious startup name - "Your wait is up, time to join Uprocket" with no additional information. Wait, who is this, I don't really care anymore. I know its obvious to you but its not always obvious to others. Just add it to your signature for crying out loud. "Uprocket - We help startups solve the problem of people not knowing what they do by adding an email signature which tells people what they do"


> Uprocket - We help startups solve the problem of people not knowing what they do by adding an email signature which tells people what they do

You could probably get a cool half million in seed money for this.


   To: all-employees@company.com
   From: elpresidente@company.com
   Subject: email signatures required.
Starting immediately, please use an email signature of the following format on all email messages, inside and outside.

   -- 
   Name McNamerson - Official Title
   Official Group Name - City, State, Country
   https://www.company.com/
Don't put anything else in. If you have trouble getting this set up, IT has put together a page for all our supported mail clients at https://www.company.com/internal/signatures

Thanks!

   -- 
   Edgar L. Presidente - Director
   Human Resources - San Francisco, CA USA
   https://www.company.com/


Edgar forgot the comma that was mandated to appear between his state and country.


Not a good culture fit.


This is a good use case for http://example.com


40% or less of your fellow employees will even open the email. Way fewer will follow the instructions.

Unless their salary depends on it.


A mail from the CEO of a start up being ignored? A dangerous career proposition...


> You could probably get a cool half million in seed money for this.

There are already multiple companies that do this. Not really any reason to raise venture money for it though.


That was part of why the comments was funny.


Are there actually? Can you point me to one such company?


Just google email signature company. E.g. Wisestamp comes to mind, but there are many others.


A lot of companies can't explain what they do either due to a lack of focus or poor writing, but this particular company's offense can be explained in one line from the post:

> It's important to remember that no one cares about your startup!

That original email was written with a tone of someone who expected the recipients to know who the company is, what they do, and expected the reader to care or be excited.

No one cares about your start up. Your customers might not even care - they just want a problem to go away.


Recent example 2 days ago:

I'm Joining Report URI | https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=15599906 (2017Nov:160points,64comments)

>skrebbel: I don't get it. What does Report URI do? (top comment)


I really like Report URI (hi Scott!) but so much of their messaging is about CSP and report-uri (the technology they use) rather than what they do (stop cross site scripting).


Troy Hunt's post details what Report URI does in the first paragraph but it didn't explain to Skrebbel how they accomplished those things.


True! It even starts with the classic "what if I told you.." and then goes on describing something that seems fantastically magical.

I learned something that day though. It's very cool that browsers can report CSP violations. HN is good for stuff like this.


Same thing goes for open source projects. I can’t count the number of times I’ve seen an announcement along the lines of “Flurboska 2.0 is released!” and then when you follow the URL there’s no info about what it does, and if there’s an About link it often just has a list of release notes for various versions. Each entry says vague things like “stability improved” which doesn’t reveal much.


My comment from a recent thread about Sway: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=15508993

/s/Flurboska/GenericPhrase

"New version of Pandora Nexus released."

Great - is this any relation to the 2 Pandoras or the several Nexuses? Does this play music on my phone or move assets into a VM? Neither, it syncs bookmarks between browsers.


Also, too much information is just as bad as not enough. I’ve seen many a project whose home page or README dives straight into technical jargon about it, telling me all about how it’s world-changing and completely unlike anything else, without explaining in one clear sentence what the thing is and why I might want to use it. You’ve got to hold my hand if you want to take me through a paradigm shift, or I’m going to assume your software is a Rube Goldberg contraption that doesn’t really do anything.


Meanwhile, in marketing school, there's a teacher writing on a whiteboard: "Never ever tell anyone what your company does."


That's a bit reductionist. What the marketing person would say is you need to lead with the benefit or value that you provide and then explain how you do that.

So say you're making software for car washes. Don't lead with the fact that you make software. Instead, show the benefit by saying something like "Book 73% more car washes" and then say "Car wash booking software to increase revenue."

Marketers are often consumed by showing the company's "Why" - but the challenge in that is it often gets too abstract and generalized and may make you sound like everyone else. A great example of this is that many companies make software that, in the end, is designed to improve end-user experience. You might be, say, a testing company. The end goal is definitely improving end-user experience, but if that is all you say, then it won't be clear how you do that, or how you're different from, say, a UI optimization tool which also improves end-user experience.


The problem is that malicious psychology has become so prevalent, that any sort of marketing formula that isn't direct honesty is parsed as manipulation. (And for good reason -- the vast majority of the time, it is.)

I don't care that your product is going to make me the reborn Buddha, because if you lead with that there's an overwhelming likelihood that your product doesn't stand on its merits and there is no underlying value. Blame the other marketers for spoiling the game if you want, but I think marketing is fundamentally a business mistake in that it makes you an adversary of your customers, not a partner. It's based on attacking customers with weaponized psychology. That's the premise of the modern field, and there's no escaping that.

If you had a product that I actually needed and provided value, you could just tell me what it was. It should be straightforward how that addresses my needs -- or it likely doesn't.


>So say you're making software for car washes. Don't lead with the fact that you make software. Instead, show the benefit by saying something like "Book 73% more car washes" and then say "Car wash booking software to increase revenue."

That still actually tells me what the product is, which is way more than we keep seeing for all these start-ups, open source software etc, which seem to revolve around hippie meaningless B.S. that doesn't provide any value proposition up front.


Agreed - my point was in reference to the OP who wrote: "Meanwhile, in marketing school, there's a teacher writing on a whiteboard: "Never ever tell anyone what your company does."

Any decent marketer, imho, would argue against not telling people what your company does (it's usually the CEO making that case) - the good marketer just moves the "what you do" to behind a value/benefit.


> but if that is all you say, then it won't be clear how you do that, or how you're different from, say, a UI optimization tool which also improves end-user experience.

In this example, what if the company isn't any different? The marketer has to find a way to hide the fact that the company they've been hired to promote is not actually that innovative. An inferior product can still be a success if the right combination of hype, timing and smart promotion is combined.


The company doesn't have to be different, but you are right that if they articulate the value the tool/software brings better than the other guy, they may win the day.

What you're describing is fast becoming a reality for most software businesses imho - the days of feature differentiation are rapidly declining.


The issue isn't that marketers are taught to be ambiguous. It's that, as a tech company, it's difficult to find a marketer who can grasp your technology well enough to write about it unambiguously and accurately. So instead companies just settle for any marketer and give them a wordbank to use when writing emails, making landing pages, and attending events.

Unfortunately this never turns out well. Even if the marketer uses the prescribed wording, it'll look like marketing BS to any engineer ("web scale," anyone?). If the marketer steers clear of any specifics, then... well, we get posts like this.

The solution is to push your marketing team to understand your product well enough that they can talk about it with accurate specifics, at least to some extent. Or hire marketers who have some basic understanding of software (cough cough).


This. Another problem is that companies often want to sell a long-term vision vs. a solving a specific problem. The end result is an abstract description of the company that doesn't connect with the end buyer.

Finally, a big issue I see is that companies use internal language to describe their software, rather than using the language of their prospect. They do this to "raise up" their messaging, but the result is often a word blob mashup of internal language and industry buzzwords which don't connect to the problem the prospect is trying to solve.


> Another problem is that companies often want to sell a long-term vision vs. a solving a specific problem. The end result is an abstract description of the company that doesn't connect with the end buyer.

Perhaps it represents a bias towards investors rather than customers?


Is this a joke, or is it based on real-life experience? I honestly can't tell. Because this might be one of the worst advices I've ever heard.


We are stealth yo, super top secret kinda stuff. The world will have to wait and we will wow em when we are done and ready.


We are SO in stealth-mode that we ourselves have no idea what we are doing!


Double stealth mode: no one knows what we're building, and neither do we

https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=4166183


heh, you didn't need to link to a parody. The "We've got an awesome team and have secured VC funding. Now, anyone got any product ideas?" from last week would have done :)


Well I don't know what goes on at "marketing school" but here's my view:

Knowing your audience seems really important to this discussion. Those of us with technical knowledge immediately want to know "what does it actually do?"

But there are a lot of decision-makers without technical knowledge who might be swayed by their "general impression of the people they meet." This group doesn't necessarily care if they're in need of what you're selling.

There's a spectrum between these two extremes and how you approach marketing is going to depend on your opinion of how the audience is distributed in this spectrum. If you believe there are more people toward the latter end of the spectrum then a more general, details-free approach may make sense.


> Is this a joke, or is it based on real-life experience?

I think it's a joke, but there is actually real advice along the same lines. When cold emailing someone with the goal of getting a phone call, you want to avoid giving the person enough information to say no.


Why would you want to do that?

I won't pretend I'm great at sales, but this is directly contrary to the advice I get, which is you want to filter out people who are a sure "no" or not a match (eg, on budget) as fast as possible so you don't waste sales resources on them while minimizing the chance of leaving a bad impression from trying pressure tactics on someone who wont buy.

What am I missing? (I guess it could be intending to be unethical, but I prefer to assume I don't understand.)


minimizing the chance of leaving a bad impression from trying pressure tactics on someone who wont buy.

This, so very much this. I love what Jeff Thull says about this... "always be leaving" (as opposed to "always be closing"). Make it clear to the prospect that you are not going to be the stereotypical sales-person who grabs onto them like a little pit-bull grabbing onto your leg, and who won't let go until they've been beaten over the head with a stick. Show them that you respect them, and leave as soon as it's clear that there isn't a good fit. Leave a good impression and later, when they do need your "thing" they're more likely to call you up (or take your call when you call again in a year).


Also, it turns out people in $industry who don't need $thing might know people who do.

If you leave a good impression, there's every chance they'll recommend you to someone who does need $thing, doing much of your selling for you -- you just have to leave them thinking "well, $thing wasn't right for me, but I'd do business with $person and $company".


When cold emailing someone with the goal of getting a phone call, you want to avoid giving the person enough information to say no.

Why? What's the point in wasting time having a call with somebody when the answer is going to be "no" either way? Better to get to "no" as fast as you can, so you can move on to a better prospect.


> when the answer is going to be "no" either way

No one is ever going to say 'yes' to a $10M sale from a cold email. They'll only say yes after they've met you in person, but they're not going to agree to meet you in person until you've done a phone call.


Sure, but that doesn't argue against "giving them enough information to say no". If the customer doesn't need what you're selling, knows they don't need what you're selling, and are never going to buy what you're selling, then you're wasting your time with the phone call and in-person meeting. That time would be better spent working on a prospect who saw your information and didn't disqualify themselves right from the jump.


> That time would be better spent working on a prospect who saw your information and didn't disqualify themselves right from the jump.

The problem is that everyone will say they don't need what you're selling, even if they do. You want to disqualify folks as fast as possible, but email doesn't work for that because even if you're selling the cure to cancer to someone with cancer, you're still going to have basically a 100% false negative rate.


Just because someone doesn't need it doesn't mean they can't be convinced to buy it.


True, but just because you can do something doesn't mean you should do it.


Remember, we're talking about sales, here. If they can make a cent, they'll do it.


What? I've been a professional marketer to varying degress on and off for about a decade now and I've never heard anyone say anything like this.


No, no, no, No revenue! Always be pre-revenue!


Right! Until people know what you do - you've got potential and thus could be worth almost anything with lots of zeros in it.


$0.005?


Strange, these things seemed absolutely self-evident.

If you want people to do something, make it as simple as possible to do so as the slightest obstacle can turn them away. That includes informing them what the whole thing is about (googling is an extra step that you can remove from the process by including the necessary information from the start). (same applies to oneself as well, e.g.: if you want to go cycling regularly, make sure that you do not have to carry the bike from the cellar upstairs to do so)


Very classic one is x.ai or Amy or whatever they call it now. They overhyped their capability of building a smart assistant for reading and replying to emails and ended up being an average service that sort of works.

Earlier, they kept telling me that I have jumped their queue and will soon get access. Now they ask me to upgrade the plan to keep using it. Complete BS!


Average? I've used it at least a dozen times in the last month, and it's worked perfectly every time. It may not be the fastest, but it's certainly the best... YMMV, of course.


It's good but considering auto-reply feature of Gmail and integration with other apps like Calendar and Hangouts, I wouldn't pay for any such solution. Of course, assuming the organization use Gsuite else, maybe x.ai fits the bill.


In a similar vein, startups are somehow obsessed with reporting on their "startup-dom": - That they were in pitch event X - That they were featured in startup mag Y - That they're attending startup fair Z

All inwards focussing, completely useless info to that/those which are most important: customers.


Depends on whom you're communicating to. The signals those startups are putting out are very important ones indicating legitimacy to potential investors.

Maybe some founders are confusing what's important to signal to investors with what's important to signal to customers?


If you think that's bad, I've seen presentations to angel investors where the CEO repeats things like "we do big data analysis to help our customers synergise and analyze..."

Q: OK, that's nice, what do you do? What value do you offer the customer

A: Big data analysis! Synergise!

<sigh>

Bad emails are one thing. Bad presentations to investors just reeks of incompetence.


Even when you think the other person is a techie, I've seen it generally helps to assume that he is not, to avoid this Curse of knowledge.

Also at least in my domain, I've found analogies are a great way to explain super complicated things very easily.

Old world physical analogies work great (like a bank, wallmart, etc) but analogies using other startups, i.e. we're the Uber of X, or we're the blablacar for Y not so much. Because sometimes the other person may not know what blablacar is (or for that matter Uber).


wait is blablacar a thing or did you just make it up? I'm out of the loop and legit can't tell.


It is a thing, and here where I live (Italy) is pretty popular - I would say more than Uber, for what it's worth.

It is a service to arrange long trips from one city to another with other people, so that the driver can share the ride and get compensated from passengers (and also have company) in return


It's also pretty popular in Romania. I have two close- and non-techie friends who have used its services.



They have 600 employees for a ride sharing app! What are all those people doing?


Wait until you hear of Uber. That ride sharing and taxi app has 12'000 employees.


When I lived in the states I used to post rideshare availability on Craigslist to share gas and company on long road trips. Now that I live in Europe, I've learned of this new company that is trying to monetize that concept.


It was different before, there was a free site that got rolled over into this company.

The main issue drivers were complaining about with the free version was no shows (=no money) which the company version tries to fix by taking money beforehand.

It's a fickle market though since every journey is independent ( so it's not hard to move platform) people are very price-conscious (many students etc) and the social features are not popular.


You have to give it to them, it's the best company name ever.


Off topic: I'm very glad the open banking API's are coming to the EU. Every app can request access to your account and build services and software around it. Think it's called PSD2 for those interested.


Was amazed when I read

"Sign-up is simple and should only take about three minutes"

If a simple signup only takes three minutes, I can't imagine how long a complex one takes!


(OP here) To be fair to them, they mandate 2FA set up. If you've not done it before, it can be a complex and time consuming process.


The first comment on the page is interesting. I believe if you have that kind of problem, you haven’t set up proper teamwork between techs and marketers to create such texts together. The one makes sure it’s great dor selling, the other that it doesn’t annoy developers and give them the information they want.


Writing copy for a tech startup is very difficult because most people who write good marketing copy aren't necessarily very technically capable.

The way I always solved this was to get someone with technical insight write the first version and then have the copywriter re-write it into a human.

It's remarkable how well it works.


Exhibit A: In your first sentence you use "isn't" when you should use "aren't".

:D

(You could also drop both uses of "very" in that sentence and it's a stronger statement.)


Heh yeah well I am not native English speaker and it did go a little fast.


I think that was the joke. All three sentences got grammatical errors.


Writing copy for a startup is not hard. It's just boring as fuck to most really good copywriters, who accordingly avoid startup jobs when possible.


That's not my experience. Most great copywriters I know like to take something convoluted and make it clearer and crisper.


My point was more that a lot of strong creative types are bored to tears by startup subject matter (I acknowledge "startup" is a broad category)


This especially applies to Trello tickets that you're writing to your own colleagues/developers.

Prior to going to DevBootcamp I worked as an engineering consultant, my product was informational reports that had to describe specifically what the problem was, how we determined that, and what we recommended to resolve it.

Sometimes my reports would be returned to me in a blood bath of red ink on changes but eventually you understand what it means to get the point across objectively and concisely.

My point is, get your copy proof read, limit the jargon, and get to the point in the first sentence.


I think a lot of tech people honestly don't know how to do this.

GIS is a database with mapping software attached. I began explaining it to people as "kind of like SimCity for the real world." People who do GIS get lost in the details. They can't see the forest for the trees. Laypeople need a quick and dirty sketch of the forest in the simplest, most pertinent terms possible.

This is just not easy to pull off when your day to day work is all about cataloguing individual leaves in this vast forest.


I have been reading Dale Carnegie's seminal book. One of the advice therein - Arouse an Eager Want.

So, while the 2nd example is an improvement, many people might read the first para - So you are attending the conference and are some kind of bank with APIs...umm..so what? Why should I be interested in it?

The better structure will be to start thinking in terms of why/what an intended recipient might want to use the API, followed by the process and conference.


_The Hidden Persuaders_ (Vance Packard, 1959) https://amzn.com/dp/B006NV977W was recommended elsewhere today. This nearly-as-ancient classic is at least an order of magnitude less mentioned but provides more depth applicable online.

>Xunxi: some of the examples are dated [...] how to "stoke the hivemind"

https://hn.algolia.com/?query=the%20hidden%20persuaders&sort...


Dale Carnegie's seminal book is "How to Win Friends and Influence People", for those who were wondering.


Our unique technology allows you to not only increment the counter, but also to branch based on whether that counter is equal to zero.


It also allows for interconnected fizzing and synergistic buzzing.


Landing pages make this very same mistake all the time.

It is one of the biggest goals for such a page, to show the what & why of the product, and still too many people do it in a way that lets no clue about what the thing is about.

It is good to see other people noticing this and writing about it. Hopefully this will be included in good/bad practices lists in the future.


"Do" may be irrelevant if you are advising someone who is an expert in a particular vertical, in which you yourself have little experience or domain knowledge.

But if they state their model is Enterprise SaaS or Subscription-based Media Content. Then its easier to suggest a quick hack for training sales teams or where to find freelance editors online, etc.


Usually burns the investors' money :)


> Starling Bank be attending $conference 2017

Arrrr!?


To be fair, oftentimes startups themselves can’t answer this simple question _to themselves_. “What is it that we do” is a loaded question, and once you answer it you’re at least temporarily committed to that cause. A lot of founders have severe commitment issues.


We leverage synergies in B2C relationships to provide growth opportunities! Duh!


But can you help us with the transformation to digital?


What is the transformation to digital meme?


It’s a great new meme opportunity, and you’re on the ground floor. Get in while you can.


Naaah, we are already onto seamless and AI-driven transformation to digital ... ;-)


Our AI-driven IoT real-time predictive ML platform provides the ultimate corporate syngergy-gasm.


I'd also like to add that not everyone (cough cough) uses or wants to use Twitter. Please, please, please also include a plain email address or a contact form so that everyone can get in touch with you if necessary.


Guess this is why my college is forcing me to take technical communication.


Checkbook.io is like this. Took me 45 min just to understand their value offering. All they need to mention is “we use Check21 instead of ACH” but it’s no where to be found.


The example given here is pretty extreme. The lack of any explanation of who the startup is and what they do is so basic that I hesitate to even call it a marketing issue.


It seems to me that their marketing is really working.. they just got to HN front page and I'm sure almost everyone reading couldn't resist googling them ;)


A bunch of people talking about "what do they actually do?" that doesn't convert to sales would suggest their marketing isn't actually working.


Well, that is taught here since 2007 or so. Most start-up guys are just young and simply don't know. I guess you need to experience that first.


Ahh yes, but then you take away the mystery. Can't grift investors or customers if you let them look behind the curtain, can you?


Maybe they do this because it creates better engagement?

If they told you their signup process was quick, they would lessen their ability to convince you that you need to sign-up right now.

If they told you what they did, then you wouldn't have to click through to their home page or twitter account to find out what it is.

And finally if you weren't annoyed, you wouldn't have given them all of this free marketing on Hacker News.


It's a basic but good point. Always mention what your start up does AND include a sign up page.

For instance, I'll often start off with something like(notice that I start off with the value proposition too): "Never break your code: We build Regression tests, so you don't have to" Check us out here: https://swif.club/?s=hn

And I include that in my signature as well.




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