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Funny to see this here. My business partner did the design and I'm friends with the team.

I can't say that I feel much for the business, but I've been continually impressed by its ability to generate press. People _love_ talking about and debating this concept, and I can't say that I've been completely free from it.

That being said, this is currently probably the most covered startup from Saint Louis. While it is nice to see a startup from this ecosystem getting this amount of press attention, it's disappointing at the same time. I know a lot of people working on very ambitious and difficult problems that would kill for a tenth of the amount of attention that Invisible Boyfriend and Invisible Girlfriend get.




I just learned about this today. This is the greatest marketing concept since "million dollar homepage." My life is a failure for not having thought of this.


> My life is a failure for not having thought of this.

Actually, I did think of this, many times. But my biggest bottleneck was: how will I scale up the replies? I could handle being a "boyfriend" for, say, 10 women. But any bigger, and I'd need help. I considered MTurk, but thought that quality control would be an issue. (What if the MTurk guy really starts hitting on the woman, they exchange numbers and then he starts stalking her?). Anyways: after considering all the messiness, I gave it a pass.


Anyways: after considering all the messiness, I gave it a pass.

There is a lesson here. "Computer people" have a real aversion to simply scaling up a business by using humans to do things. Sometimes that simple answer (hire a bunch of people to do stuff) is the right answer, provided the economics of the business work.


What? discardorama was merely wrong - the real service DOES use the approach they considered!!


Same here. Actually, I didn't think of it as a "proof" service, I was thinking that bits of positive human interaction ("invisible friend") provide a lot of emotional value, and you could crowd-source a text conversation with a fake friend, modulo quality control, and people would pay for it.


No, this would be so easy to code. Enter 100 basic phrases:

You look so [appearance adjective], my [affection term].

Hey [affection term], I'll see you at the [social location] tonight.

... and so on

Then enter possible variables:

affection term = [baby, honey, sweetheart]

.. and so on

Then buy 100 stock headshot photos and generate a random list of first/last names for each. Set up a FB/email account for each.

Then integrate with Twilio for SMS sending. Write a little cron script to send 1-2 messages to each user per day.

Done. A week's worth of work to launch.


By greatest marketing concept you mean a quick and easy way to make money, yeah? I wouldn't be so hard on yourself for not having thought of it. Personally, I believe humanity would be at a net gain had no one thought of or executed on this idea.


You realize this has real and tangible value to lots of folks, right?

Despite spending the vast majority of my life on the Internet, every single day I am disappointed by how judgmental and incapable of empathy folks are who say things to other people online.

Jesus, put yourself in someone else's shoes just this once. I wouldn't use this service, and I don't know anyone who would, but to say that Invisible Boyfriend is a net loss to humanity requires a level of hubris that, even today, is stunning to find on the Internet.

This is a life/death thing to some LGBT folks, who if outed face physical harm from their own families and friends. Helping someone like that stay in the closet until they can get to safety is a service Invisible Boyfriend adds to this world. Who the fuck are you to say that's not a value-add?


I was right there with you until you brought up the LGBT bit. This service has no real safety benefits for members of the queer community who are in danger. Full stop..


Queer person here. This company is clearly riding on the coat tails of the community and doesn't give two shits about us. They are simply marketing themselves this way to tap into a market of closeted people and they decided to play this up to boost revenue.

If they were actually concerned with the safety and wellbeing of LGBT folk they would create something that reflects the needs of communities and it would take into account how complex we are. They would not push something so simplistic on us claiming it's good for us without ever asking themselves if this is true or if their idea is actually a positive contribution to the community. I'm not sorry to say this: LGBT issues are not so simple that they can be solved with such quick fixes because a handful of community members find such fixes momentarily useful. This company might tangentially help a few people but realistically it might also make a lot of scenarios worse. More credibility to closet stories = less people out = less safety due to smaller numbers; more attention drawn to fake SMS relationship = higher chance of forced outing; transaction history on a teenager's bank account = higher chance of forced outing to parents = higher chance of homelessness and/or abuse; only some people can afford $25/mo. = separation of LGB community by class = fragmentation of community; doesn't consider the entire queer community = less solidarity; etc.

Also companies should stop saying LGBT when really they mean "some lesbians & some gays & maybe some bisexuals but not any trans* folk and definitely no one who doesn't have money".


Poor people can't afford things. So what?


Not a full stop whatsoever. You don't just get to say I'm wrong without explaining why.


In my mind there are two major ways you could keep a queer person in danger safe: 1. educate the would-be aggressors so their bigotry goes away, or 2. keep them physically safe from harm (guards, locks, etc.). This service does neither of those things.

In fact, maybe in some ways it's worse; some people may _never_ get to a point in their life where it is safe to come out. This is sort of like saying to them "you can't have a real SO because it's not safe; but here, have this fake one to tide you over". Similar to "you can't get married, but you can have this civil union".


"Your mind" completely ignores non US-cultures, so "your mind" needs to expand a bit.

Pretending like a man in Iran or Russia can come out as gay and be safe isn't going to change the immutable fact that a gay man in either of those two countries is in serious danger simply by being a gay man.


I think that falls under the first category of "educate the would-be aggressors", does it not?


I can't help but think that the LGBT folks most at risk aren't necessarily going to be over 18 and have ready access to a credit card.

Is there a way to buy an Invisible Boyfriend/Girlfriend as a gift for a friend?


I totally agree. I guess everything you could call "greatest marketing concept" is a net negative to humanity by the very definition.


I'm sure we all think about stuff like this, then reject it out of hand as if anybody would want/need something like this.

Press is good, profits are better. I'll be interested to see where this is in six months.




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