I had exactly opposite experience. I'm infinitely grateful for unlimited, unsupervised computer time since I was 9. Without that, I wouldn't have picked up programming at 13, read as much as I did and be the person I am now.
Also, "real life" is overrated. A lot of things that technophobic people spend their time on in "real life" feels like total nonsense to me - especially all that gossips, interpersonal dramas and poking their noses into lives of others.
I always pictured it as a difference between soap opera vs. space opera (like TNG), where most people seem to live in the former, while I strive to live in the latter.
I was given a lot of access to the computer, but for a long time that access was restricted in terms of what I could use the computer for. Ultimately, I wasted a lot of time messing around on computers because I wasn't able to do what I wanted (I didn't have admin privileges). It was only when I got my own computer that I was able to really excel and start to do things that really interested me.
Also, I agree as well that there's a sort of zen in mostly minding your own business and not over communicating via social networks. Compared to many of the people I know, I socialize very little. However, I find I am much happier by having less frequent but very rich times with friends, compared to frequent but low-quality time. There's a saying "absence makes the heart grow fonder" and I find that's true for socializing in general.
I had both experiences. When I was at my mom's house, technology was heavily limited, and in the hour a day I was allowed online, they were hovering over my shoulder the whole time. When I was at my dad's house, unlimited access.
I definitely gained more benefit from the unlimited access. However, I've always been a person who has been both very inquisitive and strongly ethical. I self-censored a lot of smut from myself online. I also used my time constructively. At age 12, figured out the ins and outs of audio codecs (I wanted to get audio files from my favourite NES/SNES games but wasn't allowed Napster, so I figured out how to convert MIDIs to WAVs with WinAmp). Started learning about emulation, first as a way to play video games and later as a programming exercise. I stumbled across the Earthbound hacking project as my introduction to assembly. Learned how to rip videos from video games. Fucked around with Blender for 3D modeling, and made a few shitty Flash programs. Eventually wired up my computer into the home theatre system. I played with network sniffing tools and taught myself the details of TCP/IP, wireless, mail protocols, etc. I played with various linux boot disks (Slax, Ubuntu, Arch) just to see what happened, figured out how to do sysadmin stuff from that.
I did all of this before I turned 17, and I did it specifically because I had unlimited, unsupervised access to computers and the internet. I can definitely see that perhaps others wouldn't be quite as driven as I was (my brother and sister, same opportunities, but they just fucked around on Facebook/youtube/etc). But at the same time, I think there is a certain subset of people (such as myself) who drastically benefit from unrestricted internet access.
And, TeMPOraL, I'm right with you. Most of the things that technophobic people spend their time on in "real life" feels like total nonsense. My mom, stepdad, and extended family still mock me for wasting all my time online, and yet they spend an ungodly amount of time watching shitty TV all day.
Unfettered access to a computer at 9yo is quite different to the same at 3yo. Particularly if that 9yo was accessing the computer more than about 10 years ago.
I picked up programming as well. However, I also played outside, talked to people, did well at school... I have nothing against the image of the stereotypical herbivore men/"neckbears", but I have goals in my life that I don't think I would be able to accomplish with a computer, goals like sports, travels, girlfriend/wife/family, ...
My brother, on the other hand, only played computer games. For him, the restriction was even more essential.
Also, I agree that dramas and gossip are not an interesting or worthy part of "real life" - however, gossiping and drama over facebook is even worse, because it can haunt you forever.
Fair enough, but I don't see a reason to single out computers as something dividing one's goals between good (not related to computers) and bad (related to computers). I personally don't care about sports or typical tourism, and I'm a bit tired of being called a "no-life" for that.
> however, gossiping and drama over facebook is even worse, because it can haunt you forever
Yes, and the people who do that gossiping and dramas tend to be the same that tell you to "get a life". People's behaviour on social networks reflect their behaviour in real-life interactions.
I didn't mean "real life" as something opposed to "living in the network" (whatever that means). I meant "real life" your non-geeky friends tell you to get. Also "real lifers" tend to use social media much more than "nerds" (posting mostly photos of food, babies and such nonsense).
Also, "real life" is overrated. A lot of things that technophobic people spend their time on in "real life" feels like total nonsense to me - especially all that gossips, interpersonal dramas and poking their noses into lives of others.
I always pictured it as a difference between soap opera vs. space opera (like TNG), where most people seem to live in the former, while I strive to live in the latter.