Same diagnosis. I struggle so much with wanting to help others and wanting not to tell anyone. Wanting to talk to my bosses so they can understand and wanting my privacy. Wanting not to use it as an excuse, or get special treatment but then being so angry when they don't get it (how could they?).
Also struggling with starting something and the need to finish it the same night. That one hit hard. The anxiety while I work on something only goes away when I finish, so longer projects are impossible. To avoid the pain I just stop trying to work on them.
I'm trying to get better with medication and a doctor and it is certainly better than constantly thinking about suicide but I worry that I'm never going to be productive.
Thanks for so much for your talk. And having the courage to put such a big part of yourself out there to help others.
Also struggling with starting something and the need to finish it the same night. That one hit hard. The anxiety while I work on something only goes away when I finish, so longer projects are impossible. To avoid the pain I just stop trying to work on them.
I'm trying to get better with medication and a doctor and it is certainly better than constantly thinking about suicide but I worry that I'm never going to be productive.
Thanks for so much for your talk. And having the courage to put such a big part of yourself out there to help others.