My ideal, beautiful children have never interfered with my work in the slightest as my work is an interruption of my interaction with them (and my wife). My ravishing wife has never wrongfully complained that I annoyed her for be lost in thoughts. When my family is around, why should I be "zoned out".
Married (and childrened) people often try to convince those who do without that they too should indulge - "you don't know what you're missing". If you came to the decision that a family isn't important to you, then you'd also be horrible at it (resentment can be a big issue). When an "unfamilied" person declares how pristine their life is, why can't they stop there? Your "without looking for trouble" phrase turns your personal choice into a religious battle ... there was no need.
As for how your comment ties into the post shared here? It doesn't. My kids have defaced my papers (and sometimes the walls of our house) ... they're now cherished keepsakes!
There's a lot of societal pressure to find a partner and have children. It's not hard to understand where a feeling of resentment comes from for those who aren't interested in that lifestyle after decades of being pushed towards it.
I can understand that some have pressure from family. But societal pressure? I've never seen or experienced that, certainly not for males. Could you describe some concrete examples?
> But societal pressure? I've never seen or experienced that, certainly not for males.
Not my experience. For years, when I was younger, I was pressured in many overt and subtle ways to be married and have children. A number of friendships eventually ended because my unwillingness to be married was a deal-breaker.
On hearing me express my lack of interest in marriage, one guy asked, "When are you going to start living up to your responsibilities?" That was the day I found out what "proletarian" means.
My favorite story in that connection was the day a woman I was dating confessed that, contrary to outward appearances, she had chosen me for my intelligence and was doing all she could be become pregnant by me. I instantly ended the relationship and began to seek a vasectomy.
But then the fun began -- most doctors refused to perform the vasectomy because I wasn't already married and I hadn't already had "my children". Others insisted that I had to get my wife's signature -- no wife, no procedure. One doctor initially agreed, then, when he discovered I wasn't a member of a minority group, refused.
Finally I met the ultimate western doctor who, on hearing my request, launched into a seemingly rehearsed speech that began, "Your sperm belongs to the state, son." I regretted not recording the conversation for posterity.
Then I heard about Planned Parenthood. They gave me a short speech about how the procedure was irreversible, then performed it.
Since then, since the vasectomy, on a couple of occasions I've had women say, "I'm late! And I think it's yours! Okay, I might have forgotten just this once to be disciplined about birth control, but haven't you ever been swept up in passion?"
There was a couple at our church who asked when we were going to start a family - the Sunday after we returned from our honeymoon. I think perhaps there can be a localized societal pressure, but I don't think you can look at the US and say there's an overall pressure.
Married (and childrened) people often try to convince those who do without that they too should indulge - "you don't know what you're missing". If you came to the decision that a family isn't important to you, then you'd also be horrible at it (resentment can be a big issue). When an "unfamilied" person declares how pristine their life is, why can't they stop there? Your "without looking for trouble" phrase turns your personal choice into a religious battle ... there was no need.
As for how your comment ties into the post shared here? It doesn't. My kids have defaced my papers (and sometimes the walls of our house) ... they're now cherished keepsakes!