To be fair, your memory could be only slightly altered over time -- e.g., your dad fetched you home from the neighbors, told you to wait in the living room, and brought your mother (and baby down) from upstairs, so only the bit about the door was off. It's also possible that your parents' memory is off. :)
Not that I'm disagreeing with your main points -- memories are subject to a strange game of telephone over the years. My own early childhood memories (all of childhood, really, and much of post-childhood as well) are pretty limited; I was under general anesthesia more than most kids (more than 5 times; less than 50; I can't remember), which apparently messes with memory.
By contrast my wife has abundant and clear memories of much of her life, including early childhood; she's a writer. I'm sure her memories are reworked as much as anyone's, and inaccuracies are introduced; but the raw material is so obviously greater than what I have in my own head.
> To be fair, your memory could be only slightly altered over time [...] It's also possible that your parents' memory is off.
Absolutely. In fact, I find it extremely interesting, in a philosophical sense, the implication that perhaps nothing we remember can be considered reliable.
But in this case 3 years old is quite young for an early memory and it is clear from other evidence that I have particularly poor memory for events (late age for most childhood memories, poor memories of events and conversations even today). So the most likely explanation is that my own memory is fabricated. Interestingly, that doesn't change the fact that I can still remember it!
> my wife has abundant and clear memories of much of her life [...] she's a writer
It is certainly a thing which varies strongly in different people. I am reminded of an author (I think it was Beaverly Cleary) being interviewed and mentioning that she had strong memories of her early childhood -- and that this was the source of much of her excellent writing.
> she wrote a piece about navigating the unreliability of memory
I read it. Wow... she's a great writer! Please pass on that I said so. I thought the pacing of that piece and the way it draws the reader in at the beginning were really wonderful. It is so difficult to write about racial issues in a way that is open to and accessible to readers from all races, but this piece managed that.
Not that I'm disagreeing with your main points -- memories are subject to a strange game of telephone over the years. My own early childhood memories (all of childhood, really, and much of post-childhood as well) are pretty limited; I was under general anesthesia more than most kids (more than 5 times; less than 50; I can't remember), which apparently messes with memory.
By contrast my wife has abundant and clear memories of much of her life, including early childhood; she's a writer. I'm sure her memories are reworked as much as anyone's, and inaccuracies are introduced; but the raw material is so obviously greater than what I have in my own head.
Related tangent: she wrote a piece about navigating the unreliability of memory a couple of years ago: http://www.michiganquarterlyreview.com/2012/01/blue/