My children are much younger than yours though: 3 and 6. The reflexes are just not there yet.
Of the old games, I probably can replay Castlevania SOTN, Super Smash Bros 64. I can make personal exceptions for Super Mario World 2, but not for my children, those games are highly unforgivable, even for stuff that repeats over and over: dying puts often you so far back in the level that after 10 deaths, they correctly get frustrated with the game, it's not fun anymore to repeat the same part that you already know can do. And the gameover offers no value, but it's there ready to annoy you.
For the others many game I've played, they are all full of farming, permanently missable secrets or poor punishments for failing.
I played them back then and loved them, but I was trying to play Final Fantasy VIII recently (I played JRPGs extensively as a child) and I was going to vomit over the amount of farming and boring battles that are there.
I remember picking back up the legend of dragoon as an adult and the dialogues were atrocious.
Castlevania SOTN aged well because the exploration is still incredible, but the challenge of the gameplay (combat) drops significantly once you can read English and can make some strategy: all bosses end up being very easy.
The thing we lost are couch co-op games: bomberman 64, bomberman world, baldur's gate dark alliance 1 and 2 (I know there are the remasters, but those are indeed remasters) and such, these are so rare now, you need two computers every time.
What about Metal Gear Solid? Ocarina of Time? Chrono Trigger? Crash Team Racing? Kirby Super Star? I'm not gonna say any of these games are flawless, but I do think there are at least some SNES/PS1/N64 games that are eminently playable even without nostalgia goggles.
At least two of those titles from your list I played for the first time in my life just recently and had a blast. I can’t relate even remotely to the parent. (Chrono trigger and metal gear solid).
Played and finished final fantasy 9 for the first time a year or so ago and it might be one of the best experiences I’ve ever had with an entertainment medium. It really spoke to me.
But NES/SNES, and other consoles that followed are far from “torture”. I’ve gone back and played — and enjoyed — some of these games even recently.
Sure some of them lack polish, and don’t handhold you to learn the game — that’s what the manuals were for!
But my son, who just turned 17, played through — and beat — several NES games a couple years ago and had a blast (SMB 1-3, and Mega Man 1-3).