That reminds me of Groucho Marx's stunt of "responding" to a never-actually-made legal threat from Warner Brothers (publisher of Casablanca) over his movie A Night in Casablanca. As a pre-emptive media strike, it seemed to work.
> You claim you own Casablanca and that no one else can use that name without their permission. What about Warner Brothers — do you own that, too? You probably have the right to use the name Warner, but what about Brothers? Professionally, we were brothers long before you were. When Vitaphone was still a gleam in the inventor’s eye, we were touring the sticks as the Marx Brothers and even before us, there had been other brothers — the Smith Brothers; the Brothers Karamazoff; Dan Brouthers, an outfielder with Detroit; and “Brother, can you spare a dime?” This was originally “Brothers, can you spare a dime” but this was spreading a dime pretty thin so they threw out one brother, gave all the money to the other brother and whittled it down to “Brother, can you spare a dime?”
Now, how I would have responded, THAT would have been childish.
“Dear Sir or Madam, Your company policy’s aren’t law, kindly go fuck yourselves.”