For what it's worth, depending on how many people and/or budget you have available to man on call rotations, running your own postgresql server with replication is not that hard. The RDS premium is like a whole engineer's salary by the time you get to Large Databases (tm), and if you're running production, staging, and maybe a data warehouse, it starts to rapidly be able to pay for a whole team.
People aka eng time is our scarcest resource. Luckily the thing I’m struggling with is nice-to-have, not critical, will try pg_hint_plan as suggested, I didn’t realize it’s available on RDS. Otherwise will abandon.
