What a sad comment, and I truly pity you if you do not have such people around you.
This friend is way worse than me financially and could easily take advantage of the trust but I simply know he won't. Knowing someone for 20 years, in good and bad times, helps to get to know their real side. This is someone I would trust my small children with (and I did), and so would he.
The real solution is to give it to your sworn enemies, who will show up to your widow's door and give her the package with an expression on their face that says "I could have used this against your deceased husband but I didn't because I was always better than him".
There were bad happenings with friends previously in the family. Friends suddenly wanted really fat share after the family member died.