This is a sign of depression or something similar. Usually people will suggest therapy in these situations, have you considered it?
It's far from the only path though. There's many possible causes of depression and even more possible solutions. Find one that works for you. You deserve more than shit. As someone who's been deep in that shit more than once, you can claw your way out and once you do, the world is a beautiful place that's worth growing old in. Then you'll end up in the shit again but each time climbing out gets easier.
Personally it took me moving country, changing career more than once until I found one that gave me a sense of purpose, finding a beautiful and totally surprising partner, and lots more to find my present stability.
That's what worked for me. What will work for you? You need to find that out. You only have one life, if it's shitty now them what have you got to lose by making every possible effort to change that? I mean, what could possibly be more important than making that effort? Certainly not a shitty career or a shitty relationship or a shitty family. Leave them if you need to. Nothing controls you except you. And physics, and the law and immigration officers and so on. But there's always room to maneuver.
What a gross attitude. At its best , life means you get to do hard work now and see it benefit others later. Eg raise your kids and then enjoy their kids when you are old.
This is incredibly meaningful and if someone can get their mind working this way, they appreciate every minute of life.
It feels like shit vs more shit