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I’ve been a software dev for about 15 years, and did the assessment about 2 years ago.

I got into software because it was the single thing I cared about that could earn me money. I really had no idea what I was doing and constantly went from frying pans into fires, learning what I needed in a frantic race to avoid being “found out”, so to speak. The last 7 or 8 years has been a lot better now that my foundations are better and I have a bit more confidence. My career would definitely benefit from more confidence.

> the kind of intelligence it takes to do software dev

This is true, but I suppose at the time I didn’t believe I was actually doing it. I’d endlessly compare myself to genius-level developers, or simply others with skills I didn’t have. If someone at work could do something better than I could, well, it was obviously because I’m incompetent. How could I be 10 years in and this person who’s 5 years in understands debugging and testing so comprehensively? Man, everyone’s going to realize I’m a fraud soon. I better cram in testing and debugging research this week.

The IQ definitely did come as a surprise in spite of that. I can mechanically shovel software knowledge into my brain, but I don’t do anything novel or interesting with it. I write okay software, but it’s largely just a feat of mimicking the work of intelligent people. I can make the thing that makes the company money, but I can’t make a thing that others would mimic as I do.

As I mentioned in another comment though, a lot of this was me being insecure, indulging that to excess, and being quite neurotic about it to the point that I was clearly overlooking significant advantages I had over others who truly did and still do experience disadvantages due to lower intelligence. That was a well deserved blow to my ego, to realize I was so self absorbed as to ignore values I believed were important to me. I didn’t think I was like that, but in fact I was — extremely so — for decades.

If I can live comfortably with a job in software, why am I spending time feeling sorry for myself while other people, some I know personally, live with less because society values their minds less?

I suppose though that the reason I didn’t want to see the IQ score is because I suspect it was too late in life for me to respond in a meaningful way that would be aligned with my values. I have the sense that I squandered something. Rather than feel sorry for myself about it, I’ll do my best to turn things around.




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