> I get offense usually isn't intended but the use of that phrase has always stuck me as a very condescending way to respond.
You recognize it's not meant to be offensive, but you want to treat it as offensive? Wouldn't it feel better to assume good faith and not treat it as offensive?
The same phrase spoken from one individual to another can be interpreted as offensive or not. Tom might say "Fuck you!" to Bill, but Bill is best friends with Tom and knows he's kidding, and laughs. If they didn't know each other, Bill would get offended. But either way it's just words. Tom's intended meaning doesn't change despite what Bill wants to assume the meaning was. It's up to us to decide to get offended or not.
You recognize it's not meant to be offensive, but you want to treat it as offensive? Wouldn't it feel better to assume good faith and not treat it as offensive?
The same phrase spoken from one individual to another can be interpreted as offensive or not. Tom might say "Fuck you!" to Bill, but Bill is best friends with Tom and knows he's kidding, and laughs. If they didn't know each other, Bill would get offended. But either way it's just words. Tom's intended meaning doesn't change despite what Bill wants to assume the meaning was. It's up to us to decide to get offended or not.