Sometimes it sounds like bay area programmers think how expensive their area is, is how it is for programmers elsewhere. I also get paid around the same range in NYC, but my mortgage is nowhere near 10k, my taxes eat maybe 40%, and I can definitely find restaurant meals for less than $30.
The high expenses of the bay area are a policy choice by the local and state government to disallow investment. As such everyone is competing for the same old housing stock and office space that cost a 1/3rd of what it does now years ago. In effect, house owners and landlords are appropriating tech profits to themselves.
I hope the banning of single home zoning in California helps to alleviate this issue.
OP explicitly mentioned Bay Area in his post. I'd agree that housing policy is brain-dead in the Bay Area and that causes a lot of the high CoL; the other major factor is that these tech salaries are a significant fraction of total earners, which gives people selling to them enough of a market to raise prices. If 1% of the population makes $300K/year, they get to live like a 1%er. If 10% of the population makes $300K/year, they live like a 10%er.
The high expenses of the bay area are a policy choice by the local and state government to disallow investment. As such everyone is competing for the same old housing stock and office space that cost a 1/3rd of what it does now years ago. In effect, house owners and landlords are appropriating tech profits to themselves.
I hope the banning of single home zoning in California helps to alleviate this issue.