The article was great, but this was an annoying set of substitutions. There's a perfectly cromulent way of creating technology-agnostic content: metasyntactic variables like "Foo" and "Bar". Instead, the simple substitutions made half the article a meta-meta-guessing game, first working out which technology the word translates to, and then trying to work out whether the author meant to rag on those specific user groups (some communities have a reputation for being more fanatic than others), whether they were meant as metasyntactic variables, or whether there was some other point in there. I couldn't work out which it was.
In my eyes, the substitutions he used really embiggens the audience of the article.
I come from a EEE background, and "Foo" and "Bar" just don't make sense to me in the way that i, n or f do. Sometimes Foo is a function, sometimes it's a variable, sometimes it's a whole framework.
BeetleDB, on the other hand, is clearly a DB client. It's on par with "Alice" and "Bob" in terms of clarity and minimal mindfucks.
Springy Search - ElasticSearch
beetleDB - CockroachDB
bongoDB - MongoDB
StopLang - GoLang
IronOxide - Rust
YourSQL - MySQL