I wouldn't agree that people choose products based on what their friends are using. At least for me it doesn't work.
While the second part is true, I agree.
It's really hard to overcome existing players, on the other hand there are some advantages: existing players are kind of slow in terms of changing (adding new features) and in terms of support.
Among these 170 alternatives, more than half of them were built in 2010 I guess, and they do not evolve.
Regarding paid ads. This year I was watching how other guys do with their side projects and I literally haven't seen anyone who tried paid ads. They did SEO though, but not google ads or something like that. Because they are good at reaching the right audience in the right place, I guess.
People often choose products based on what their friends are using and what they see people online mentioning.
How can you get in front of people first without spending tons of cash on marketing and paid ads?