@teekert I was mainly putting myself on lookathrwaway level, to hopefully provide advice to a fellow Aspie.
The beauty is in the eye of the beholder, as one say. I perceive that there are plenty of different axes to look at things. But I refuse not to see the broken vase as a whole, no matter how beautifully you frame the shiny pieces.
Most people have been broken one way or an other. Some even celebrate it ; I find it quite sad and would rather avoid it, but who am I to know ?
I used to have things I didn't get at all like music, until the day it clicked. Even though I won't ever reach the level of masters in the art, I have enough to find it interesting. But more importantly that was an enlightening and humbling experiment that there are things you don't get until you do.
I enjoy the state of mind model, where to learn a new thing you try to search the state of mind where this thing comes naturally.
Once you get the right state of mind some things become easy , and some other things harder, but communication with a person in the same state of mind flows easily.
Often meeting different people and understanding how they deal with things can help acquire a new state of mind.
>How would you feel being judged as several levels below me?
As an aspie that as been judged stupider than I am most of my life, I have grown past it.
There are usually interesting experiences I can pick with anyone, although the ratio effort/reward depends a lot on our relative paths. I get that life sometimes put you in shitty situations and I don't judge people. As much as I enjoy the occasional serendipity that the chaos of life can bring, I enjoy creating my own path more.
You do sound like nice guy and like my "Aspie" friend, very intelligent and fun to talk to.
But my Aspie friend felt genuine discomfort around new things and people and he tried to rationalize it by saying he didn't care. But I think he did care. He even cried for a full room when he left us (almost making many others almost cry as well)!
I think he would be better off admitting his feelings and accepting them trying to work from there. He even told me once he read some research where over-expressing some gene would make people feel less need for control and how this could free him in a way.
But who am I, I may be completely mistaken and project a "Vulcan-like deep emotional life that needs to be controlled" -picture onto him, while this is not how it is. But I felt a bond with this guy, I think we did share very similar thought routines. We both felt a need for control but I felt less fear for unexpected things and human connections, though we certainly both felt the need.
The beauty is in the eye of the beholder, as one say. I perceive that there are plenty of different axes to look at things. But I refuse not to see the broken vase as a whole, no matter how beautifully you frame the shiny pieces.
Most people have been broken one way or an other. Some even celebrate it ; I find it quite sad and would rather avoid it, but who am I to know ?
I used to have things I didn't get at all like music, until the day it clicked. Even though I won't ever reach the level of masters in the art, I have enough to find it interesting. But more importantly that was an enlightening and humbling experiment that there are things you don't get until you do.
I enjoy the state of mind model, where to learn a new thing you try to search the state of mind where this thing comes naturally.
Once you get the right state of mind some things become easy , and some other things harder, but communication with a person in the same state of mind flows easily.
Often meeting different people and understanding how they deal with things can help acquire a new state of mind.
>How would you feel being judged as several levels below me?
As an aspie that as been judged stupider than I am most of my life, I have grown past it.
There are usually interesting experiences I can pick with anyone, although the ratio effort/reward depends a lot on our relative paths. I get that life sometimes put you in shitty situations and I don't judge people. As much as I enjoy the occasional serendipity that the chaos of life can bring, I enjoy creating my own path more.