Wait, what? You think a 45-minute commute is good? The 1.5-hour thing is simply beyond the pale.
You need to get out of the urban megacity.
I've lived in several parts of the USA. My worst commute was 20 minutes by car, and my current commute is 3 minutes by car or 15 to 20 minutes by foot. These were all software development jobs.
The reason is that I choose small cities. I choose places that have suburban density, though they aren't technically suburbs because people aren't commuting into an urban megacity. The jobs are local.
Another nice benefit of this choice is my expenses. Houses go for 10% to 20% of what you pay in a place like the Bay Area, not even counting the extra land you get. Nearly everything else is cheaper too. Gas is half the price. Groceries are cheaper. Taxes are much lower.
Why? Is getting lost on the way to work a problem? A month into working anywhere, you learn all the ways to get there anyway.
And a 45-minute tram ride to work on winding streets beats a 1.5 hour traffic jam on a nice, wide, straight 101 North any time.