You joke, but seriously, this is generally a goal of distributed and/or parallel computing. Reduce interdependencies, stop constant cross chatter and try to do as much computing in isolation as possible.
Scrum’s not necessarily a bad anology. Here’s a different thought that this conversation has me now thinking about, what if we did think about development teams as CPU cores? We might discover weak points in the architecture of an organization, and recognize more quickly where we need to address bottlenecks. The bandwidth of the bus betweeen the cores might be too limited. The pipeline of work (backlog) might not be deep enough, and has a ton of branch statements (spikes) that may throw out the entire pipeline...
I have a golden rule for my systems. After booting into X and opening one terminal with htop and hiding kernel threads, everything should fit very comfortably in one screen. This constraint forces yourself to have a very simple setup. A few daemons, a window manager and a terminal. I do the rest of my computing in Emacs and Firefox.
I have several Arch or NixOS setups that could work on a 128 MB RAM setup, excluding Firefox. Plus, if something breaks, I know how to fix it.
Would you expect 24 employees to write ONE email without 4 team leads and one department head?
Obviously NO!!
Your processors obviously need more management. I think Intel has the right offering for you, aka management engine.