Anyone who says "Programming? My husband does something like that I think." deserves, if not mockery, then something more like pity.
Passion isn't necessary, but why bother being in a close relationship with another person if you're not even going to learn what it is that they spend their time working on?
Programming? My husband does something like that I think." deserves, if not mockery, then something more like pity.
Issues with programmer ego aside, how is this any different from suggesting that your husband is a doctor without saying he is a pediatrician, a lawyer without saying he specializes in tax law, or a pilot without mentioning that he flies F-16C's?
but why bother being in a close relationship with another person if you're not even going to learn what it is that they spend their time working on?
For the same reason that you have no idea what this year's hot brand of shoes is: it's not a common interest.
Now, not having ANYTHING in common isn't exactly promising. However suggesting that this particular passion is more important than others - simply because you happen to share it - isn't exactly insightful.
if you say your spouse is a doctor, without knowing they're a pediatrician, something is problematic. you don't have to tell uninterested passersby the exact speciality of this hypothetical spouse, unless they inquire. similarly, you don't have to tell these passersby the language your spouse programs in; but the article is suggesting you ought to know it. (and thus be able to answer if asked.)
Peoples' day jobs are generally something they spend at least 8 hours a day, 5 days a week doing. That's what makes them more important to know at least something about.
I don't know anyone who spends that much time thinking about shoes.
I wouldn't put it quite that strongly, but you're actually not far off.
I would say: If you were lucky enough to grow up with good enough opportunities (education particularly) that mean you don't have to take whatever job you can get, then you owe it to yourself to find a job that you can be passionate about - after all, you're probably going to spend at least 40 hours a week doing it!
Given the assumption that two people in a serious relationship are this lucky, and so have full time jobs that they are passionate about, then yes - I do think the relationship would be lacking something fundamental if one partner said "Uh, <job title>? I think my partner does something like that".
You're making the same mistake the author does: Appeal to Ridicule.
It is most certain that partners need to invest something in a relationship, and by default that includes experiencing the partner's passion.
Have you ever thought that the open admission of ignorance disguises the fact that the person is fully aware of the level of expertise that they do no have? In other words: programming is hard - too hard for most to fully appreciate. Being open to this is a basic admission of the fact, not a cast off.
To suggest that these people are off limits because of this is just silly. To suggest it by using an example of partner that is also a programmer even more so.
I think people are missing the point. A woman who answers "I think my husband does something like that" is probably with a guy who's only doing it for the decent paycheck. This type of programmer is the one joelonsoftware and all of the tech elite crowd discourage hiring. I promise you that for a lot of people who work a job only for the money, the last thing they want to talk to their spouse out is the work. Career and passion are different. This thread sucks.
Passion isn't necessary, but why bother being in a close relationship with another person if you're not even going to learn what it is that they spend their time working on?