I agree that you need to make sure there are people in your life who know clearly (ie, you tell them honestly and openly) what you're going through, who can stand by your side as you go through several attempts at coping with this.
I can assure you right now that if you ever went through with it, there would be several (if not dozens) of devastated people going "If I had only known...!"
I can assure you right now that if you ever went through with it, there would be several (if not dozens) of devastated people going "If I had only known...!"
As for how to involve other people while still "saving face" and not being too much of a burden, I always liked Jane McGonigal's "recovery game" idea, maybe this can give you some ideas: http://blog.avantgame.com/2009/09/super-better-or-how-to-tur...
I wish you all the best!