On: * cures (or causes) cancer

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For those of you not familiar with the type of articles printed by the Daily Mail, here's Dan and Dan's Daily Mail Song:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5eBT6OSr1TI

(Scaremongering cancer headlines near the end here - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5eBT6OSr1TI#t=1m51s )