I feel like this is the entry point to a new piece of dark speculative fiction, in which extreme age is venerated, and the number of goats attached to your back becomes a symbol of your wealth and power.
Perhaps a larger animal. Detachable coupling of course and some sort of programmatic control of the beast. The coupling would include devices which would increase the concentration of life giving material and turn back less desirable properties of the blood.
I would ride upon a great blood engorged elephant and take pity upon all the unwashed goat tethered masses.
I storm through the seas like Poseidon himself, a conquering champion, grafted to the back of a 24-foot baby blue whale. Next time around, though, I'll ask the doc to position me in front of the blow hole. Rookie mistake.
> The real trick will be to keep the goats from chewing on your shirt collars.
That's easy. Duct tape it solves everything..
Or you can genetically engineer a goat without a mouth. :-)
Sure, it will look odd, but that will just be the price to pay to stay young.
The real trick will be to keep the goats from chewing on your shirt collars.