That version loses the emphasis on recognizing that there are distinct aspects of mathematical intuition. Congratulations! You successfully changed the meaning of the sentence! The intended audience is mathematicians and philosophers, these people can be expected to have full grasp of the English language and to engage with the paper.
I once was working with a horrible boss like that. I'd write a draft of the paper, she would not understand subject or prose and change some sentences into something else, based on her limited understanding of the subject and the prose. It was excruciating. You'd read her draft full of MBA-speak and couldn't make out the meaning of some of it!
First off all, the meaning is equivalent and this sentence is completely unnecessary. Repeating your intents in sequential lines doesn't add meaning.
"The first order of business will be" is a placeholder used in speech, to me it has the equivalent meaning of "Uhm, I will be". Care to elaborate further on what you think the special emphasis of this phrase is in this context?
>Congratulations!
Not to edit your style bro, but the condescension is a bit much. Seems like you have just soured on editors due to some bad personal experiences. Editing is suppose to be a two way conversation in which the editor marks up all possible errors and you accept the changes that you think add clarity or just rewrite it yourself knowing that your previous version was unclear to at least 1 person.
That said, I don't really see the grey area in this case.
I once was working with a horrible boss like that. I'd write a draft of the paper, she would not understand subject or prose and change some sentences into something else, based on her limited understanding of the subject and the prose. It was excruciating. You'd read her draft full of MBA-speak and couldn't make out the meaning of some of it!