edit: I'm surprised by your reply... only because it seems incongruous with the statement I replied to. interesting.
Just because people were well-intentioned didn't make it any less infuriating. I've gotten it in the "cheer up" sense and the "be more presentable" sense and the "comply with norms" sense. Not a huge difference in how it feels, non family ones are a bit easier though.
Wow. If you're curious as to why some view it as a condescending thing to say to a colleague you really could start there.
edit: I'm surprised by your reply... only because it seems incongruous with the statement I replied to. interesting.