My Dad was a police officer and I moved around a lot as a kid, so I had more than a decade of experience being the new kid before I graduated high school. I figured out some things and still use them when I’m new in organizations.
1.) Learn names.
2.) Avoid tribes at first. It’s tempting to latch onto the first group that welcomes you, but try to avoid this. For at least the first few weeks, focus on developing superficial relationships with lots of people over deep relationships with few.
3.) Find the cool. Starting something new often triggers something like mourning. Give yourself space to mourn the old, but force yourself space to find extremely cool things in the new place. You’re closing one door and opening another. Hunt the cool! It’s easier to do this if you form lots of relationships early on.
4.) Everyone is shy.
5.) I got to know two types of cops’ kids:
- “The place I lived two moves ago was the best.”
- “Whatever town I live in now is the best.”
Guess who had an easier time making friends.
6.) DIY. Your new town might suck and the place you lived last move may have actually been the best town on earth. It got that way because people had ideas and did it themselves. You got the idea from someone else so 5% of the hard work is already done…:)
7.) Once you’ve been the new person, your most important task is to always help new people.
1.) Learn names.
2.) Avoid tribes at first. It’s tempting to latch onto the first group that welcomes you, but try to avoid this. For at least the first few weeks, focus on developing superficial relationships with lots of people over deep relationships with few.
3.) Find the cool. Starting something new often triggers something like mourning. Give yourself space to mourn the old, but force yourself space to find extremely cool things in the new place. You’re closing one door and opening another. Hunt the cool! It’s easier to do this if you form lots of relationships early on.
4.) Everyone is shy.
5.) I got to know two types of cops’ kids:
- “The place I lived two moves ago was the best.”
- “Whatever town I live in now is the best.”
Guess who had an easier time making friends.
6.) DIY. Your new town might suck and the place you lived last move may have actually been the best town on earth. It got that way because people had ideas and did it themselves. You got the idea from someone else so 5% of the hard work is already done…:)
7.) Once you’ve been the new person, your most important task is to always help new people.